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LIKE THE SUN SHE WAS NAMED FOR, SOLARA HAD BECOME RORY'S WORLD. Waking up to the sounds of Roman playing with Solara, lying beside her with the baby on his chest or between them, a genuine smile on Roman's face; it was those moments that made everything worth it. She was sunshine and light, the sweetest child one could ever dream of.
Solara grew so much everyday. Rory noticed the changes with harrowing realization that her little baby, her precious love, was growing up. From physical changes, dark hair that curled and eyes as bright as her father's, being able to reach out to the person she wanted to hold her, and intellectual changes, distinguishing between her favorite knitted blanket Letha had made and the scratchy one from the hospital or squeezing her little hand around Rory's finger to keep being cuddled to her chest after being fed. She smiled and she was the golden sun of Rory and Roman's life.
As beautiful as her life had become, all golden light and the scent of a newborn, then there were the dark aspects of motherhood Rory hadn't expected. And it creeped up on her like a eclipse, shadowing her in dark moments when she least forecasted it.
Sometimes, after Roman fell asleep, she would lie awake for hours, his arm around her waist, and when Solara would begin to fuss, a part of her just wished she would stop. But then Roman would awake easily enough and Rory would feign sleep as he got up instead to check on Solara.
Holed up inside the house, sleep deprived and anxious, adjusting to motherhood was more difficult than she let on to anyone.
The week after giving birth and the entire Olivia ordeal, Rory remembered crying for hours, feeling helplessness and being overwhelmed by it all. Roman could do nothing but hold her, endlessly whispering apologies in her ear for what his mother did to her and their baby. Her mother and aunt and uncle were worried for a while, Stella prolonged her stay in Hemlock Grove to make sure they were getting the support they needed.
And within a few days, the baby blues had eased and Rory returned to her usual self, so everyone else's lives returned to normal; her mother returned to Forks, her aunt and uncle to their own home and work, Letha decided to take a head-start on college, Peter took to working at an auto repair shop (refusing the job Roman offered him) and Roman began his new position as the CEO of Godfrey Industries.
Everything should be perfect but Rory wasn't.
000
Roman couldn't get the words out of his head.
She was ready to marry me, but you can't say the same, can you?
Fucking asshole.
Fuck Jasper Hale. He didn't know anything-except he did. He knew Rory. It was unmistakable, his adoration of Roman's girlfriend was certainly undesired and cumbersome to acknowledge. And once the anger, the rash, envy like poison in his mind, had faded, Roman knew Jasper was serious in his concern for Rory. But Roman watched her. She seemed fine, of course she was an incredibly anxious mother who doted Solara's every cry, but that was normal. Right?
