Does it get Better?

"How Do I Cope?" Chp. 7

*knock knock*

I hear a knock at the door. I don't feel like answering. I stay silent while still curled up on my bed.

"Please open the door Ochako. I want to help you."

I hear a familiar voice say. Why does Deku want to help someone like me. I couldn't save my family and I cry like a baby all the time. I'm one of the weakest people ever. How did I even make it into UA?

I get up and walk over to the door and smash my forehead against it with a loud bang. It hurts but I deserve it. It kinda gave me a relief. I don't know how to explain it. Just made me... happy I guess. I don't move just leave my forehead on the door feeling the pain linger.

"O-ochako?! Are you ok?! What are you doing? Please open the door!" I hear Deku say from the other side.

I grab the door nob while taking my forehead off the door and open the door. I face Deku, I wonder what I look like. The pain in my forehead comes back and strong. I grab my head and fall to my knees.

"Ochako!"

Deku kneels down and lays his hand on my shoulder. I look over at him, the worry in his eyes, why? Before I can say anything he picks me up bridal style and lays me on the bed.

"I'm going to go get some bandages and pain medication. After we fix your wounds I want to talk to you about... your mental health." He says then walks out of the room.

I'm not shocked he noticed. It's not like I'm good at hiding it. I'm glad he cares but why? I sure wouldn't care if I was him. I can't keep going on like this, but my mental  health isn't going to get better just like that either.

I need to find a way to cope with my emotions. Maybe I could destract myself by doing other things? No that won't work. Maybe I could eat away my feelings? No if I want to become a hero I can't get out of shape. Do I want to be become a hero? Ofcourse I do! I have come this far and I'm not going to let it go so easily.

Maybe I could work myself? Ya, I could work myself really hard so I can make my parents proud and get revenge on who ever killed them. I will train and spar and work out till I can't stand.

Before I can think another thought Deku opens the door and walks in with a bag in his hand.

"I got the stuff you need, here take it. Oh and a cup of water so it's easier to take the pain killer pills."

I smile at him. He's always been here for me. I take the bag out of his hand and grab some bandages out, pain killer pills and a water bottle. He sits of the edge of the bed.

"Thanks-"

"Dont mention it. About what's been happening."

I was cut off by Deku, he must be serious. I look at my hands hiding my face with my hair.

"Have you been blaming yourself Ochako?"

My eyes open wide with shock and I look up at him. How could he possibly know that.

"I guess that means yes. Look, your not alone. You've got me, and everyone else at UA. We are all here for you."

I wanted to say something but what could I say? My mouth felt like it was glued shut. Deku grabs the medicine and pores out 1 pill. Then opens the water bottle and hands both to me.

"Your head probably hurts, here take these. It will make you feel better."

I put the pill in my mouth and take a sip of water. Then I swallow the pill and water. I then hand back the water bottle.

"Deku, do you hate me? Because I hate me. I hate everything about myself. My looks, my body, why weakness, my thoughts, my weight-"

I'm cut off by deku hugging me tightly. Him arms around my waist and chin resting on my shoulder. My eyes fill with tears on there own.

"Why can't I just be perfect?" I say bring my arms around him griping on to his shirt. "Why can't I have parents like everyone else?! Why do my parents come back to haunt me? Deku tell me! Please tell me... why do I deserve this." I cry into his shoulder.

"You don't Ochako. You never deserved this. But life is unfair and you have to deal with the things life throws at you and work with the things you got. I don't really know if this is a god thing or not but you have me. You will always have me. I'm here to comfort you, in here to lo- I mean um..  be here for you, ya haha" Deku stutters at the end.

He really is something. I pull away from the hug and look up at him smiling. He cups my face with his hand and whipes my tears away with his thumb. I blush a little and hope he doesn't notice, I sure notice his face though. Bright red, you would think I would be happy about that but he's like that with all girls so I won't think anything of it.

"Do you want to go to a cafe together, just me and y-you?" Deku says out of the blue.

My face heats up more than it was before. Like a date? What does he mean? Does he like m-

"L-like a date?" I question nervously.
While closing my eyes thight whith my head facing down in embarrassment. While I grip into the sheets of the bed.

"If you want it to be." Deku says in a quiet voice. My eyes open wide and I look up to his eyes. "Yes! I would love to!" I say genuinely happy for once. He turns red. "O-ok see you Friday!" He says with yet another stutter and speed walks out of my room.

I jump off my bed and celebrate. Yes! He asked me out, he really asked me out! This is great, no this is amazing!

I then look at my bed. Oh the bandages, I should put those on.

Thanks for reading, sorry for not updating in awhile. Hope you enjoyed anyway.

Word count: 1086