ISABELLA

Twenty nine

You look beautiful as always sweetheart, I will never get enough having you in my arms, I love you" Matthew cup my face, and kissing my forehead.

Oh matt, i love you more

Our lips touched, it's cold, so cold.

Saya buka mata saya pelan-pelan, laamaa sy befikir then baru saya ingat pasal kejadian yang berlaku . I cried

Again.

If this is what he want, then fine. There is no way i cant halang someone true love is it ? I can't, even me myself, love him so dearly, may god be with you always matthew.

Saya bangun dengan badan yang sakit, the struggle i am that night was a shock for me smpai sekarang saya bole rasa badan saya crumbling for that. Luckily saya ada simpan sedikit tenaga for elak kan diri dari that things happen to me.

Saya mandi, taking my time in the bathtub, crying for some more before i make some decisions about my future.

Sing a bit louder to erase my sadness, walaupun sakit, sakit betul perasaan saya.

Saya rasa lama betul saya berendam, bila tengo kulit saya mmg lama sy berendam, then sy ambil tuala and keluar dari kamar mandi.

Semua yang saya buat skrg ambil masa yang lama.

Oh

This is what they called sadness.

Sadness make us lacked in everything we do. Because we overthinking something that maybe even in the reality would not come.

How dumb.

Saya tngok jam, 1 petang. Kenapa i feel tidak lapar ya ? Is it because i am sad as well ? Tch, damn you. In this cruel world, why dont we be cruel too ? Can we ?

Saya duduk atas katil, and berfikir lagi, but i dont know what i am thinking ! It's drive me crazy !

Saya cari phone saya, and call kawan kerja saya.

"Helloooo ! Ee baru mau call kunun, lama suda sy tunggu kau chat ka call ka aiyah "

"Hai natalie, saya ada mo minta tolong ni can ?" Sy cuba sedaya upaya saya untuk tidak menangis, i can't cry.

"Sure bella, u sound hm down i guess ? Are you okay ?" Dia tny. Saya senyum "yeah i am okay"

Beberapa minit kami becall then sy off .

Saya tengok cincin di jari saya. Sy genggam jari jemari saya dengan erat. "Goodbye"

Saya kemas semua barang2 saya, and call my driver to get me here. Lepas suda sedia2 saya buka pintu saja, hampir saya telanggar makanan di atas tray depan sya.

"Heh m-matthew ?" He look at me and smile so perfectly. 

"Hm balik suda ? Atleast have a tea with me ?" Saya tida faham oh gaya dia ni, sekejap itu sekejap ini, what is his points ?!

In the end, saya ikut juga cakap dia.

While the maid serving us the tea, we sit silently and look at the garden that i use to love.

"Soo, sy dengar kau rancang utk tinggal kan rumah ni right ?" Dia tanya tanpa pandang sya.

"Ya. Lepas sy keluar dari sini, saya mau teruskan kehidupan saya seperti biasa, and kau dapat teruskan kehidupan kau seperti biasa selapas kau dapat ingatan kau semula its lebih baik utk stay just like the old" matthew angguk tanda faham and minum sedikit dari tea yg kena kasi sedia.

"Saya baru saja becakap dengan your dad and mom about our engagement, just like what you thought it will turn out.. i broke the agreement "

Broke ... the .. a-agreement?