"Agent Hotchner, may I speak with you privately for a minute?"
Hotch looked up from where he had been sat like a statue for the past 5 hours. It was the same nurse who had updated the team on JJ's condition when they had first arrived in the waiting room. He nodded and left the room quietly, so as not to disturb Prentiss and Reid who were finally getting some sleep.
"How is she?" He asked as soon as the door shut behind him.
"She's still in surgery, but we just received her blood work back from the lab. Agent, I'm sorry to have to tell you that she tested positive for HIV."
"Oh God, does that mean that… that they…" Hotch couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence. He wiped a hand across his face in disbelief.
The nurse seemed understand what he meant, his tone was reassuring as he replied, "It is possible that the virus was transmitted sexually. We would need to perform a rape kit to confirm it, I should warn you, though, during our initial assessment of Miss Jareau, we discovered a bruising pattern on her breasts that is concurrent with that of a sexual assault."
Hotch sagged against the wall, leaning into it for support. This couldn't be happening. They must be mistaken. And yet, they had all known, deep down since the moment Garcia had identified her that this was a possibility. No, a devastating probability. He was vaguely away of the nurse saying something else.
"From what you've told me about her circumstances during her captivity, it is entirely possible that the virus was transmitted via a shared needle or blood-to-blood contact."
Hotch couldn't quite comprehend the mix of emotions that was washing over him. For the most part it was dreadful combination of sorrow and anger but there was a tiny, whispering, sickening part of him that was hopeful. He shook his head in disbelief. How could the thought that his friend had contracted HIV via a contaminated needle be a source of hope? How could the world be so wrong that the only upside to this entire situation was the slender chance that his friend hadn't been raped?
The nurse was still speaking. "I realize this is a lot to process but is there anything else you can tell me about Jennifer's circumstances over the last three years? The more we know about her ordeal, the better equipped we can be to help her recover."
Hotch clenched his fists, a simmering rage beginning to replace his anguish. He could feel it threatening to boil over, rising in his chest like a tide. "No. But I know someone who can." He took one of his business cards out of his pocket and handed it to the nurse. "If her condition changes at all, you call me immediately." The nurse just nodded; he knew a man on the edge when he saw one. He watched as Hotch walked away, headed towards the hospital exit.
Within 20 minutes he had arrived at the police station. He took a couple of minutes to compose himself. But this was a different kind of composure to normal. He knew he couldn't afford to go in there as riled as he was, Santiago would never allow him to speak to the bastard who had held JJ prisoner if he went in there looking as though he would happily murder him. He parked in the farthest corner of the parking lot.
It felt good when he slammed the door of the SUV shut, but not good enough. He slammed his fist down on the hood, allowing his rage to overtake him. He didn't even care when tears began to fall down his cheeks, he just kept punching the cold metal, finding a release in the pain it sent pulsing up his arm. Finally he let out a yell of fury and collapsed against the SUV, sinking down so that his back was leaning against the wheel. How had everything gone so wrong?
After several minutes he dragged himself up off of the floor. He was exhausted, in every conceivable sense of the word, but straightened his tie and brushed off his jacket, then headed into the precinct.
