Broken and Bruised-Kian Lawley/O2L

Chapter 8

Yall I'm back

That night when Kian got home he slammed the doors. All you could hear was shouting and cursing. I curled up into my bed and just stayed there not wanted to get out of bed. That night wasn't the best way to get better.

It has been a few days since then but Kian just stays in his room alone the whole time. I decide that i don't really feel like going to school today. I 'get ready' and start heading out the door. Ricky throws me a breakfast bar. I take a bite as I close the door. Once I close the door all the way I spit it out.

I head down the street and wait for the boys to leave. I plug in my earphones and lay back. I stare at the sky and the clouds. I can smell the salty water and I can hear the waves falling down on each crash.

Soon enough the boys leave and i head back into the house. I go back up to my bedroom and get out what I need. I get out my speakers, phone, and tissues. I curl up into a ball in my bed. I cuddle into my leggings and a plain long sleeve gray shirt.

"Oh, dear brother, just don't hate me
For never standing by you or being by your side"

Those lines made me break down. I was to sad to hold it in anymore. To much had happened in those short few days. School got worse and so did I. I wanted to do it again. I always want to do it.

I grab my phone as short sobs come from my mouth. I read through all the nasty comments about me, the names I am called, all of my insecurities. Imagine that. Everything you can possibly hate about yourself is thrown back in your face. It kills me.

"I'm so sorry" I whisper.

I throw my phone on to my bed and rush to my bathroom. I quickly grab my blades and dump them on the floor. I close my eyes and wave my hand over them. I pick up one and open up my eyes. My eyes land on the biggest sharpest blade I have.

"Perfect" I sigh.

I play music as I slip into the shower. I sit down in the large tub and smile at the ceiling. I hum the melody of the song in the background  as I slide the blades across my wrist. I can barely feel it anymore. The feeling of the cold blade hitting my hip and scaring it brings me a smile. I can believe the enjoyment I get out of it.

Just as I am about to slide the blade again down my arm, my phone rings.  slowly get out of the tub and drain the water. I pick up my phone to hear Ricky's voice.

"Where the hell are you?" He sounds on edge.

"At home idiot" I frown.

"What the fuck I told you no more skipping school." He starts to lecture me more but I hang up.

I walk back out of my bathroom and start to head downstairs but i run into Kian and a friend. This friend was a still half-way drunk brunette slut. The clothes she did have on had cuts and rips every where. 

"I taught you where at school" Kian sighed.

"Get her out of here" I growl.

"Shut up slut. No one asked the dog to speak" She bites back.

I run back into my room before she can say more. I slammed my door and listen to hear them leave. Once they do I curl up into a ball and fall asleep crying.

I wake up to Ricky yelling at me to come downstairs. I slowly roll out of bed and start to walk down the stairs. Once I get to the bottom I let out a deep breath. The other guys were here as well. Good side: Ricky wont scream. Bad side: more than one lecture. I sit down on the couch and await for the lecture.

When the lecture is done I just smile at them. I hadn't heard a word they had just said and they just realized that. They go off on a rant again and I just roll my eyes. Soon enough I slam my hands down on the table and stand up.

"Would you guys stop yelling at me? Yell at the guy who decides its ok to bring drunk girls into our house" I say and storm out.

I grab my board and just ride towards the night sky.