The Day Of All Days {Like, a Billion Ships} Homestuck

Dave's Hive/Gamzee's Hive <Phattest Rhymes>

"Yeah, that's pretty great, John. Yeah. Uh... huh. Welp, gotta head out. Karkat's here." Dave was on the phone with John for what feels like a god damn year. He was so tired of talking to that dweeb-tron. I mean, don't get him wrong, he loves the dude like a brother, but he talks so god fucking much. Now that he's at the thought, maybe he should call Karkat. See if he wants to hang out. It's only like, 10:30, Troll/Human time. God knows Karkat doesn't sleep, but Dave hasn't been sleeping to good recently either.

Meanwhile, in Gamzee's hive,

            Karkat could feel himself coming down from his high, which, at the moment, was the last thing he wanted. "I'm sorry, Gamz, I gotta go, I really do." Karkat said. "Alright, Karbro, if that's what keeps your horns on your head. I'm not gonna go and all mess up a motherfucker's flow." Gamzee wiped his mouth. Karkat grabbed the rest of his pie, you know, just in case.

             Karkat walked out the door, leaving Gamzee alone to clean himself up.

            Karkat got halfway to his hive when he just plopped down onto the dirty sidewalk. He looked at the pie. "Nah, I don't want that shit." He muttered to himself. "Fuck it." He scooped up a little bit of the pie, wincing at the sight. It looked disgusting, but he knew the feeling that it let him keep. The nagging pain in his jaw was back, all to a sudden. He looked up to the stars. He saw a small wishbone-shaped constellation. Karkat then saw something, and jumped. "God fucking, Kankri-" The slightly taller troll with white eyes that could pierce a soul.

            "Language, Karkat. What were you doing in this clown hive? And what is this circular gelatin cake? Is this made of sopor? #disgusting #soporslimepie You know, Karkat, that rusts your think-" "Yeah, I get it, fuckass. And guess what? I had... I... with a Makara!" Kankri gasps, distressed and dramatic. "Oh, Karkat, I must go. I must. #kankriaway #kankriout #littlewhore"Karkat spit at him. "And, Kankri? Just one thing... please don't tell Kurloz." Kankri rolled his eyes and sneered. "Don't worry, #slut. I won't be talking to any of the #Makaras anytime soon." Kankri yelped, not too unlike a chihuahua, then disappeared.

             Karkat's small flip phone rang. He doesn't get calls. He's not sure why he really has it. He didn't think to answer. He left it in his pocket, dipping his finger in the pie. He jammed it into his mouth, then waited for the voicemail to see who it was.

            "Erm, hey, Karkles. Do you wanna come over and hang out or something? Nothing like, weird. I mean, like, miss me with that gay shit, y'know? Hehe. Kark? Karkles? Karkat? ...Ah,  forgot, you didn't answer me. Ha! Gotta go, dude. See ya. If you wanna." Dave's voice sounded like a smooth, lo-fi SoundCloud rapper. Karkat's head gained a sharp, piercing pain for a split second, then went away. "Ah, motherfucker!" Karkat stops. "That's why he likes to say that so much."

Karkat kicked the empty pie tin under a dying grey bush and staggered ungracefully to Dave's hive.