The Day Of All Days {Like, a Billion Ships} Homestuck

DISCODSTING <Sollux's Hive>

            Karkat stood in awe, looking at the floor. On top of the pile of freshly printed shirts that said "I got double-downed" was a long, blue and purple scarf, not dirty at all. Karkat had seen Eridan wearing the same exact scarf last night as he walked to Dave's. He also seemed to be walking in the same direction as Sollux's place. Karkat decided that it would be a grand idea to investigate.

            He looked around the hive. It was one large, dark room with a small closet attached. There were loud fumbling noises from the closet. Someone or something was definitely in there. Karkat could not see a thing in there, so he widened his eyes and turned on the light from the other side of the room, which helped a little bit. He stumbled over the piles of stuff and made it to the closet. He was ready to face any monster that was in there. Not really. He then thought to himself...

             Where is Sollux? I heard him earlier, stupid ass. And that was definitely Eridan's scarf. Maybe... oh my gog. Oh gog. Jesus fucking-

            Then, apparently, someone must've accidentally kicked the door open and Karkat was disgusted.

            "Wha- oh my god, ew! What the fuck, guys!" Karkat said, shielding his eyes.

            Karkat just stood their in disgust, while there they were. Eridan and Sollux, and they were kissing each other, and the worst and weirdest part was that Eridan was on top.

            "No, Karkat, it'th not what it lookth like!" Sollux said, squirming out from under Eridan, who sat there, ashamed, but still aroused. His fins were fluttering and his face was a plum purple color, along with Sollux, who was yellow, and looked like he was about to puke up piss. "Theriouthly, we were jutht, uh, we're-" Sollux stopped to think. "Drunk! As fuck, Karkat. So I suggest you leave before we're vomiting all over you." Sollux flopped to the ground, lazily. He then muttered, "Oh thit, I'm tho drunk I can't even thtand on my own two legth. Agh. Fuck." Karkat rolled his eyes.

            "I know you guys aren't drunk. I mean, gog damnit I wish you were, but you're not." Karkat wiped the sweat from his forehead and stared Sollux in the face. Eridan was owning whatever they were doing in that closet. Karkat has just noticed that he was wearing a doubled-down shirt and red and blue gym shorts that were way to wide for him, like they were the first thing he could find in the closet. Sollux was wearing yellow boxers and holding Eridan's cape over his head. "Listen... I won't tell anyone, as long as I don't walk in on another one of your sloppy make out sessions again, or this shit's getting plastered on Tav's horns." Sollux coughed a little bit when he said that. Eridan smirked. "Don't count on it." Sollux pinched him. Eridan's fins fluttered again.

            "But, you know, 'cause I'm here, I'd like to know... how did you guys end up like... that?" Eridan sat up, completely ready to overelaborate.

            "Well, last night I was very tired after I had made a promise to play Fiduspawn with Tavros and I had to wheel him up and down the hill. So, I walked down to Sollux's place. Uh, just a second, I need to work on something..." Eridan muttered to himself a sentence that contained lots of "s"'s. "Alright. Blagh, what the hell are you doing here at thith hour, Ampora? and I said Well, I was just runnin up and down hills for like, an hour and I'm tuckered out. And then Sollux was like, Okay, well then come in and maybe I'll do something to perk you right up. And then he put his t-" "Baghhh, thhhhh... thut uuup! He doethn't need the detailth, Ampora." Karkat chuckled.

            "Wow, Sol. You're such a horny motherfucker, you settled for Eridan." Said Karkat. Sollux slapped him on the arm. "Hey. I wath... uh, okay, fine. I'll tell you. But you can't judge me!" Sollux took a deep breath in. "I'm on heat. And obviouthly, I'm not a fan of talking about it, but... you know. I jutht needed to-" Karkat cringed. "Say no more, young comrade." Karkat assured. Sollux and Karkat weren't the best of buddies but when it comes to heat, you NEVER gossip about it to another troll. One troll's heat stays to the troll and whomever said troll tells.

            "So, Ampora, are you on heat?" Karkat asked, shifting his eyes warily. "No." Eridan said, flat-faced. Sollux raises his eyebrows, impressed.

            "Well, then, guys, I'm gonna tell you something. If you ever tell anyone else, your ass is grass. You're dead to me." The both obliged. "Okay. Well, I just came from Dave's-" Sollux looked at Karkat, puzzled.

            "Thith early the morning? Why the fuck were you at Dave'th plathe at thith time- Thtrider?!" Sollux got up and started cackling, spitting a little bit. "Looooother! You fell for Thtrider?"

            Karkat started at Eridan with a dead glare.

            "I wath horny, alright?!"