The Day Of All Days {Like, a Billion Ships} Homestuck

Dave's Hive <Troll Pig>

Karkat knocked on Dave's door, almost tripping back down the steps, which took him about a half hour to get to. Dave beatboxed to himself for a few seconds before finally answering the door after a loud, booming, "Get out here, FUCKASS!" Dave chuckled and opened the door.

He was expecting to see little, angry Karkat who complained about every little thing he saw, but he stepped a little farther back when he saw him. In place of Karkat, there was a similar looking, same height troll. But, this troll's face was bright red and he looked like he just threw up a fruit roll up. His hair was insane, his sleeve was almost rolled up to his shoulder and his shoes were on the wrong feet. He figured this might be Kankri or a shapeshifter trying to give Karkat a bad rep. "Kankri?" Dave said, puzzled at why he'd be here. "No no." The tomato troll said. "...Karkat?" Karkat shook his head up and down violently. "No shit, nooksucker." Karkat stepped inside and flopped on the edge of the couch, then rolling off of it and onto the floor. He stretched and closed his eyes.

"Uh, Karkles, bro, what's up with you right now? Are you good?" Dave questioned, completely unsure of what the actual fuck was happening. "Are you, uh..." Dave inspected his eyes, they were pale and his pupils were largely dilated. "You're high? Ew." Karkat laughed and got up with his arms spread out. "Well, I'm sorry, Strider, but if you don't like it then I guess you're going to have to-" Karkat's legs have out from under him and he flopped right onto his face, arms still open wide.

Dave helped him up, worried. "I mean, I know the trolls use sopor for sleep and shit all the time. But don't you normally water it down?" Karkat chuckled. "Well, duh, that stuff can make you go batshit wild, but I'm a responsibilitable boy. Who cares if I just came from Gamzee's? A little hanky-pankity never hurt a troll, amirite?" Karkat said, slurred. Dave sat in thought for a moment, trying to go through what Karkat just said. "Wait, Gamzee's?! So, you're telling me you had fucking juggalo troll sex AND got high off sopor in what, an hour?" A dim-eyed Karkat looked around, whispering, barely even making sense. "Well, just between you and me, it was a little more like 15 minutes, but it was still pretty goo-heheheheh!" Dave scoffed at the thought of Gamzee and Karkat even being in the same room together. He always knew Gamzee had some kind of thing for Karkat. At least it's not some kind of kissmesitude (Idk how to spell it), Karkat would flip his shit. Maybe Karkat even has red feelings for him. But that can't be it. He thought Gamzee was flushed for Tavros, and now for Karkat? This... strains his brain.

"Listen, you fucking troll pig, I'm gonna put you in bed and if you wander off I'm gonna stick your head in the oven and have Equius sit on your back, got it?" Karkat saluted. "Yes, sergeant!" Karkat licked his lips. "Ew. Stop." Dave said. "That sounds like a sex thing."