One Shots Black butler x reader

Grell x Depressed! reader

*F/n p.o.v.*

My life has been pretty normal, well, up until this ginger haired reaper showed up. He came to reap my grandma's soul, rest in peace granny, and he has not left my side. Him being around is so annoying and I hate it. He always says that he wants to have my children. Which I don't know how that is possible considering I am male.

I actually don't feel. . . male, I feel like neither gender. It is hard to explain, but I don't feel male or female, I just feel me. I have not told anybody about this and I fear of what might happen to me if people found out.

My appearance is very feminine like but still mascunine, so I thank god for that. I am rather short with a petite body. My eyes are smaller than normal people's eyes and my lips are thin. Other than that, I could be mistaken for a girl or boy if dressed up right.

That is the catch up on my life, really boring. I have a normal life, with a normal job, with a normal reaper stalker.

I am currently walking home from work and it is quite late out. I worked overtime today because I need the money so I don't get kicked out of my house. I walk up to my door and it's quiet, too quiet. I enter and see nothing. I close the door behinde me and once the door is shut everything becomes clear.

"Happy Birthday, n/n (nickname)!" The red riot shouts as the lights misteriouly go on. I am not fazed by this in the slightest. I continue to put my bags down and take my jacket off. "You're not even going to acknowledge me?" The reaper screams to me, "How devastating."

"Hello Grell," I say with fake enthusiasm, "how was your day?" I am really not in the mood for him today. I just want to cuddle up with a nice book and some tea.

"It was long and tiring," Grell says complaining about killing people for a living.

"Why is that?" I ask regretting my choice of words, "Wait don't tell me I don't care." I fix my mistake and start to go into the lounge area in my house.

Grell gives an over the top gasp. "How can you be so mean to me?" He does a dramatic fall onto the couch that is next the chair I am sitting on.

"Isn't William going to kill you if you don't do your job?" I ask wraping a blanket around me. And then I grab the book on the stand next to the chair.

"He let me have the night off so I could spend it with you," Grell says. I look to him and glare. He is stilling giving me a look despite the glare. I roll my eyes and put my book close to my face.

"Don't lie," I scuff, "You just said that so you could get off of work." He obviously did that for that reason. One because he is an annoying brat who will do anything to get off of work. And two because there isn't a cake, and I really like cake.

"If that's how you feel I'll leave then," Grell says and I roll my eyes. "There is something in the kitchen for you," Grell then leaves. I didn't expect him to leave.

I groaned and got up to look in the kitchen. Once I got to the kitchen there was a pretty cake sitting on the counter. And a present sitting next to it. I feel really bad now. I open the present and find an outfit.

The first peice I pick up is a white long sleeve shirt, and then I pick up a red pair of pants. Next is a long, bright red, coat that looks to be pretty feminine. Finally I pick up something I have been wanting but I haven't had the courage to buy, a black corset.

I look to the side and see a note. "I know you feel like me. You don't feel like you belong in your body or any body for that matter. So I thought I could get you a mix of feminine and masculine clothes. I hope you enjoy them n/n. Sincerely, Grell," I read it out loud to myself.

I sigh and look over to the cake. Written on it is 'I know you feel bad now so eat some cake'. I laugh at this because he is right, he knows me so well. Why am I so mean to him? He still likes me and hangs out with me even though I treat him so terribly. I feel awful.

"Oh hey, my depression is back!" I say to myself as I wipe a tear away. I have had depression before but that was before I met Grell. Now that I think about it I think Grell is the reason my depression decreased a lot. He is always there to help with my mental state. "Ug, I'm such an idiot."

It's been about four months since then. And Grell's visits have been more scares. The first week was fine, the normal amount of visits. Then he started not showing up everyday which gave me a break. Next he showed up like twice a week. Now, present time, I haven't seen him for four weeks straight.

I'm walking home from work, it was overtime night again. It isn't terribly dark but I was still a little scared. When I got home, I put on the corset Grell got me along with a white shirt and the red pants too. The pants are not skin tight and are quite baggy which makes them supper comfy.

I get into my reading chair and begin to think. Which is never a good idea because that's when the depressed thoughts come. And I am right, here they come.

What if I killed myself? Nobody would care, the only person I really talk to is  Grell and even he left me. I'm just an insignificant bug to everyone and everything. The fact that I don't feel a gender is enough that nobody would ever talk to me again. I should just give up.

"I should just give up." That thought has been crossing my mind for a while now. Maybe it's someone trying to tell me something. Giving up on eveything would mean death, right? And, for some reason, I am ok with that.

"Tonight's the night," I whisper to myself. "Tonight's the night, I'm really going to do it."

"Tonight's the night you're going to do what, darling?" A very fimilar voice asks from behind me. The voice is soft and soothing, I missed it so much.

I jump out of my chair and turn around and see that blessed reaper. I jump hug him, which means my arms are wraped around his neck and my legs are wrapped around his torso. His arms instictivly wrap around my body. "Please, don't ever leave me again," I plead with him. His grip tightens on me and his head nussels into my neck.

"I won't, I promise n/n."  Grell sat on my reading chair with me still in his grasp and he drapped a throw blanket over us. I fell asleep in peace for the first time in a month.
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A/n
This was really hard for me to write because sadness. But I hope this is what you wanted UzumakiAkira and thank you for the request!