These Four Walls -Niam-

part 3

Hiya!!!!!! thius chapter incliudes self harm so dont say i didnt say i didnt warn you (taylor swift blank space....) love yall!!

Theaxx

ps- this chapter is dedicated to Love669 for being a faithful reader and vote-er LOVE YOU!!!! <3

In this time I've lost all sense of pride

I've called a hundred times
If I hear your voice I'll be fine

Niall’s POV

It has been three days, seven hours and twenty-three minuets since Liam left…not that I’m counting. The past few days have been horrible. I can’t get pictures of Liam and Danielle hugging, kissing or even having sex out of my head. I haven’t been out since Liam left either; I guess its cuz I don’t want to be out when he comes home…if he comes home. Even though I haven’t been eating, every morning I made breakfast for Liam and set it out on the table. I also made him lunch and dinner but I always ended up throwing it out after a few hours because the cereal was soggy or the soup was stone cold.

I slid off the couch that I had been living on the past few days. I wandered over to the bathroom and slipped my shirt over my head. I frowned into the mirror when I saw what looked like a lump of fat over my stomach area. I poked and prodded it. I felt tears prick my eyes and fall down my now even paler, hollowed cheeks. I was never going to be perfect. Sighing I stripped off all my clothes and got into the shower. After going through my normal shower routine I spotted a razor that I assume Danielle left at the house at some point. It was pale pink but that wasn’t what I was reaching to it for, I wanted the blades that were encased in the plastic. Using my frail hands I managed to break the plastic enough so that I could retrieve the blades. I carefully held one of the blades in between my thumb and pointer finger. Looking from my wrist to the blade I shakily brought the blade down. I ran the blade along my wrist. At first it stung like a bitch but after a few seconds the pain dulled and a new, strange pleasure emerged. I watched as the little red beads of blood formed along the cut and then made a beautiful red trail down my forearm before hitting the shower floor, making the water pink.

I continued to turn the shower water pink until I felt a bit dizzy and light headed. Stepping out of the shower I went over to the medicine cabinet. Grabbing gauze, antiseptic cream and some pain killers I walked into me and Liam’s room. I cleaned my cuts and then applied the antiseptic cream and after that the gauze I then took two pain killers. Slipping on some sweat pants and one of Liam’s hoodies I walked back into the lounge. Collapsing on the couch I took my phone off the coffee table. I don’t know what I was expecting a call maybe, a text or an email. I sighed when I saw none of the above. I dialed Liam’s number for exactly the one hundredth time today. When it went straight to voicemail I felt the tears fall down my cheeks at a rapid pace until I was full on sobbing and fisting the couch wishing my Liam was home. Or that he would answer my calls. I knew that if I heard his voice, even if it was for a few seconds, I would be fine again.