Someone Somewhere Is Made For You

#20 He is avoiding me

Ella.

Nisha met me in the canteen after the class. Apparently, she has been busy with the college magazine and working in the library the whole time. She is the sub-editor and it looks like it is a big deal.

I stirred the coffee absentminded as my thoughts ran back to what Michael said. It's still hurting me every time I think of it.

"What is it?" Nisha asked me after a while. "Why do you look so down?"

Even I don't know why I feel so depressed like this. I felt like Michael is deliberately keeping away from me and I feel that it is somehow my fault.

He looked cold and indicated that he regrets taking me back. Is he worried that I will ruin his project?

But I am only attending the conference with the team; I am not the one who is presenting it...

"I wish I had paid attention in the class," I said slowly.

"What are you talking about?" Nisha looked confused.

"It's not because I am stupid, Nisha, I was not at all interested in the IT field, That's why I didn't want to learn it..." I said. "I don't know...maybe I am a bit stupid too."

"You are not!" Nisha said. "I know you from school days, you give everything to the things you love, be it the music or anything else, you are very good at it," she said. "And you always never cared about things you don't have any interest in,"

"Maybe I should have cared..." I said slowly. "Then I won't feel so useless like now,"

"Is it about Michael again?" Nisha looked angry. "If he's making you feel awful about yourself, then he's not the one for you, Ella,"

"He didn't do anything, it's just me,"

"Yeah, keep on defending him,"

"It's true!"

"How long are you going to chase him like this? Why not just let him know about your feelings?"

"Then what if he doesn't even talk to me anymore?"

"So what's your plan?"

"If I stay by him, He might notice me eventually,"

"So you are just planning to stay by him forever?" She looked at me. "It's the last semester for him,"

I shut up.

I can't bring myself to say that he is not even allowing me to stay by him now.

He had told me that we should not meet anywhere else other than the project room.

I got up abruptly. Nisha has a way with putting the hard and cold truths inside my head and I don't want that now.

"Nisha, I...I need to go now, Jiji and Jinu are waiting for me." I said.

Nisha gave me a look.

"This is not over, Ella; we will talk about this later."

...............

Even though I waited for a long time at Jenni's house, he didn't appear after his part-time job and I confirmed that Michael is somehow trying to keep away from me.

"He is very busy recently," Jenni said.

I nodded sadly.

"The tech-fest is only a few weeks away and we only have a couple of project classes."

I am scared that Michael won't see me once the project is over.

Jenni looked at me.

"Did something happen?" She looked at me.