A Letter Confessing My Love
(A/N: Who the fuck is Rex??)
Dear Rex,
I cherish Walmart, where we first met. The moment I clapped eyes on you, I knew you were going to be a big goblin. Recently, I have began to regard you as much more than a big goblin.
My feelings for you intensified when I saw you daring in the moonlight. I was further wowed by your tremendous dying skills.
You have lips like broken eggplant and the most lazy leg I've ever seen. When I look at you, I just want to spank those broken eggplant lips and bite that lazy leg.
You're so special with your crazy ways. The way you handle your stunning ex wife shows great generosity and patience.
I know that to you I'm just a wet idiot but I think we could be happy together, complaining like two dirty ducks.
Please, say you'll be mine Rex!
All my love,
Ally
