The Ties that Bind Me Book 1

All Illusions Come To An End

It had been a few months in when I finally started to understand what I was in for. I and been beaten, whipped, punched and put into men's beds as punishment for disobedience. It seemed though that it wasn't as bad as it could have been and it took me a couple of weeks before I found out why. Inara had pulled me aside one day and had a perplexed look on her face.

"Imirial what have you done to Lolek? He has been threatening those who punish you that if you are broken they are dead." This shocked me and I couldn't believe it. Even though I was getting punished he had still been protecting me the only way he knew how.

"I haven't done anything to him Inara, I haven't spoken to him unless I have had to in the past months." She looked skeptical but kept everything to herself. She walked away in a huff and I could tell that she would never be friendly with me again. In that one second I knew that she had loved him for his rough ways, but she didn't understand what that truly was.

I looked up and leaning against the door I could faintly see Lolek staring at me, watching me intently. I still wasn't ready to talk to him and no matter how childish it sounded I wasn't really sure I could trust him. I looked at him one more time and felt a tightening response from my body before I ran to the only sanctuary I had ever known... The Library.

I grabbed my book from where I left it on the table and began to read through it again. It was a diary and the more I read of her the more I began to know this strange woman. She talked of a portly man of incredible esteem and how she secretly wanted to be his. She told of his valor in leading and his prowess at combat. She was a poet, a literary artist with her words and she drew me further and further in every time I pick up her book. I was so enthralled with the book that I didn't even hear him enter, but the sound of his cane next to my chair brought me out of my reverie and I could feel myself pale. His words were gentle but I could hear the rebuke even as he spoke.

"I see you found her journals. You out of everyone here found them. I left them out in plain sight for so long and yet no one touched them. She was amazing, loved to write and express herself in ways that people don't appreciate anymore."

I quickly jumped off the chair and bowed my head and curtsied. "Good day Master, how may I be of service?" I knew I was in trouble, knew the beating would ensue, but even as I flinched his touch led me back to the oversize chair."

"Here lately I have been looking for actual conversation. Each 'How may I be of service' drives me insane. I started this venture to teach humility but then my reputation started to precede me and well I guess I fell into the habit. I have never been a gentle person, which I know. Even my Tamara knew that, and I guess it was her that changed me."

I quickly looked up at him and for the first time saw the scar that was over his eye. "Her wording is beautiful; I thought this journal came from the 1600s. Knowing that it isn't makes it even more wonderful; her wording is artistic and shows wonderful imagery. I have never read anything like this, it is amazing sir."

I felt him sit on the arm of the chair. "You know it was her that brought out the cruel side in me, her that loved the harsh side of life. I guess you can say it was her that led you here Imirial. You look so much like her but you have none of her hungers. The punishments you have been given were to also see if you did have her hunger, but your body does not respond that way." His fingers brushed my cheek and I had to consciously stay still or else I would have flinched at his touch. I had taught myself that over the months flinching gets you hurt worse.

"Sir I do apologize but I must get to my chores. I have a lot to do today." I moved to get off the chair but his hand pushed me back down.

"No my dear, I think it is time you learned how pain can make your life more interesting. I bet with a little help your body will respond." His hand grasped me tight and I could feel the skin start to tear under his hand. He led me from the library and across the compound to what looked like his suite. It was lavishly decorated and opulent to say the least, more like gaudy. He rushed me into the room and threw me onto the bed. I moved to run but he stood over me and I could see in his hand a whip. I wanted to scream, cry, do something but my body stiffened up and as soon as the lash hit my skin it came out in a rush I screamed from the pain. When I could breathe again I saw Ghassan standing over me. I started to move away but he held me there, his face inches from mine before he closed the distance and kissed me.

I started to struggle against him trying to get away but he placed his other hand on my free arm and pinned me in place. He bit my lip until it bled and I gasped giving him entrance to my mouth. I felt the hot tears down my cheeks and he laid me back on the bed and ripped my clothes off. I cried harder when his hands roamed over my body, his hand finding its way roughly between my legs. From there I detached my mind from my body and internally cried.