Ghost Of You (Jalex)

VI

Zack's POV:

We drive home in complete silence. I know I need to let him have his space to think before I tried to talk him into doing anything.

I knew he'd go back to Alex. He was miserable without him, it was as clear as day. He didn't go a day without crying over him and the guilt of leaving him behind. I know what Rian said will probably make that guilt worse, so he's bound to come around even sooner.

I hated myself for not figuring it out sooner. I knew about Alex for a long time, just not what made him the way he was. I knew Jack was sad over leaving someone, but he never once told me his name. It all made sense finally, and maybe I could get them to talk to each other once more.

We pull in the driveway, Jack getting out of the car silently, unlocking the door and walking in. I sigh, entering the house behind him. He walks to the edge of the staircase, stopping dead in his tracks.

"Jack? Are you okay?" I ask, approaching him.

"I want Alex back," he murmurs, squeezing his eyes shut tightly. "I can't believe I hurt him so bad."

"Go back to him."

"I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"I already hurt him so bad, I'm so destructive of everything. That's why I left in the first place."

"Jack, I don't think you understand how much he cares about you. I don't know much about him- I've only met him a handful of times- but after hearing what Rian said, he needs you."

"He... needs me?"

"You guys need each other." He looks at me, tears swimming in his eyes. I pull him into a hug, letting him cry. I wanted my best friend to be happy again, and I knew Alex would do that.

After he stops crying, he pulls away, taking a deep breath. "I need to see him."

"Rian and I have an idea of just how that can happen."

"Fill me in."

"Okay so, on Christmas, we'll have you meet him. I'll have both Rian and Alex over. I'm going to need you to stay upstairs while we exchange gifts. I told Rian to tell Alex that I'd have an answer about your disappearance by Christmas, so I'll tell him at that point. I'll tell Alex that I didn't feel like I should be the one to tell him the news, then I'll go upstairs and get you. I'll have Rian distract him when you walk downstairs, and I'll leave it up to you to decide what you're gonna do and say. Sound good?"

A small smile curls the corners of his lips, and he nods. "Yeah, that sounds really great. Thank you, Zack. Thank you so much."

"Of course. I want to see you happy again." I smile, giving him one last hug before we part ways for the night.

-=+=-

It's December 25th.

Christmas Day.

I get dressed, knocking on Jack's door to make sure he was ready. Rian and Alex were to be here any minute. He opens his door, looking like a nervous wreck.

"You ready for this?" I ask softly.

"I mean, I'm just seeing the love of my life who I destroyed and who thinks I ended my life, so I'd say I'm completely ready," he remarks sarcastically.

"It's going to turn out good, I promise."

"I know, I just hate myself for putting him through all that pain."

"You two can heal together, and now you just have to treat him as best as you possibly can."

"I wouldn't dream of treating him terribly, I've put him through way too much."

I nod, hugging him quickly as the doorbell rings downstairs. I pull away, running down the stairs.

"Haven't you ever heard of closing he goddamn door?" Jack hollers after me. I chuckle, taking a deep breath as I open the front door.

Tonight would change everything.

Alex's POV:

I enter the house, excitement involuntarily bubbling inside of me. I might find out that Jack is alive today. I set my phone on the coffee table once I take my shoes off, shedding my coat as well. I sit down on the sofa beside Rian, just talking as we drink egg nog, Christmas music filling the air. We exchange gifts, my real smile making a few scattered appearances throughout the evening.

An hour passes, and Zack sits in the chair across the room as Rian and I stand beside each other. This is the moment I'd been waiting for the entire night.

"I know you've been waiting to hear the news, so I suppose I'll tell you now...," Zack starts, trailing off. My heart sinks, and I grasp Rian's hand for support. He looks at me reassuringly before turning back to Zack.

"The situation about Jack, I- I don't think I can do the justice of delivering the news...," he trails off again, and I know the answer.

Jack is dead.

My mind goes silent. My heart practically drops so far down that it falls out of my body. I rip my hand from Rian's, running out the front door. I'm wearing socks, skinny jeans, and a light long-sleeve shirt, which won't do any good keeping me warm, but I didn't even care.

I hear Zack and Rian calling after me, their footsteps slowly growing more distant as I run like my life depends on it. As I'm running I hear a third voice calling me. A voice I recognize all too well. The voice that got me through my hardest times and encouraged me in my best. The voice that soothed me during panic attacks and the voice that screamed blink-182 lyrics with me in the car. The voice that belonged to Jack Barakat.

I don't turn around.

I keep running.

I had to have imagined it.

I sprint away from that house, not paying attention to where I was going. The town melts into unfamiliar countryside, woods surrounding me. The snow is still falling, and it's thick enough here to leave footprints on the ground. I collapse on the forest floor, shivering violently due to the cold. My body shakes with sobs. I knew it- I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up like that.

My shivering subsides after some time and turns into shallow breathing. I start feeling confused- what was I doing here? What's going on? I'm dying. I'm dying of hypothermia.

Am I suicidal? No. Do I care that I'm dying? Not really.

More time passes when my body becomes hot. I pull my shirt over my head, but the heat doesn't dissipate. Black starts to fill the corners of my vision as I try to kick off my jeans, but my body grows too weak. I can't think; the only thing I can think about is Jack. Where was he? Why wasn't he with me?

"Jack?" I call out weakly, not thinking. My voice echoes in the empty air around me, snow still falling. I hear footsteps running toward me, and I look up to see who had approached me. Through my blurred vision, I see the boy who I'd spent eight years grieving over kneel beside me, taking my hands in his.

"Alex, Alex, I'm here, stay awake, come on, I'm sorry, I didn't, fuck! Don't fucking die Alex!" He picks me up very gently, cuddling me into his chest, but I'm too weak to react. He starts running, keeping me as close to him as possible. The darkness closes in until I'm left with tunnel vision, growing worse by the second.

"I love you," I whisper, barely being able to let any sound out of my dying body.

"I love you too, Lex, I love you so much," he says, his voice breaking.

I feel a lazy smile spread across my face as I fall into unconsciousness.