jueves | yeonbin

city lights

He feels like today is the day. He has woken up perfectly on time and was able to pick a cuter outfit than usual.

He wants to look good because uni is consuming him. He barely has time for himself and books keep piling up on his desk and he feels like it's too much for a 20 year-old to handle. So putting a little bit of a sweet cologne he bought a few days ago and grabbing his favourite coat feels refreshing, and helps Yeonjun feel a little bit at ease. Almost like he doesn't have responsibilities and his life is fully under control.

But it isn't, so now he's on his way to the bus stop. He's feeling nervous. Just a little.

His choice of outfit isn't because of tallguy, obviously. He keeps reminding himself that. He doesn't care what a stranger might think about his appearance. He has better things to worry about and he's better than that.

He arrives as the bus does and steps in. He didn't even have to wait? Today is definitely the day.

Until it isn't.

Yeonjun occupies his usual spot and looks around the bus only to find out that tallguy is nowhere to be found. Yeonjun tries to convince himself that it's fine, but fails miserably. He can't help but unconsciously catch his breath and make his tongue click and maybe he is a little bit disappointed. He didn't dress up for him but he wishes he could've seen him because, deeply, he thinks that making the guy notice how pretty he looks could make him be the one to approach Yeonjun instead.

His thoughts embarrass him and his face is burning red.
He, at least, is thankful that no one's watching the scene he's making right now.

Yeonjun shakes his head and mumbles a weak 'shut up' to himself. It's ridiculous.

He's having a debate in his head about a guy he's never even said hello to. He plugs in his earphones as the bus continues his path and now he's at uni looking for his friends because he wants to at least have breakfast. Hopefully a coffee will mend his mood.

When classes end, Hueningkai and Beomgyu try to make him go for a hot chocolate. He's tired and has to finish a project but he sees his friends' pleading eyes and how hard they are trying to convince him that he can't help but give up. He has been so busy that he hasn't been able to hang out with them lately. Yeonjun knows he owns them that.

They decide the best plan would be grabbing their drinks and going for a walk around the city. The sky is already dark as it's winter and you can notice a few stars if you look carefully. It's beautiful, he thinks.
Yeonjun is relieved he picked that coat, otherwise his teeth would be chattering nonstop.

He pays attention to the things Hueningkai is saying. The younger is so naturally funny that even though he's just telling them how his week went, the two boy accompanying him can't stop laughing.

Yeonjun has always admired him. He doesn't even need to try, it's the way he is. He doesn't know a single person that dislikes Hueningkai. You couldn't hate him even if you tried. He wishes he could be half as extroverted as him. He gives him a warm smile, encouraging the younger to keep on with the storytelling. Yeonjun stares at the funny look on Beomgyu's face and he doesn't know how, but the three of them are inseparable. And he's so glad.

They walk down the main streets which are filled up with people. The holidays being near make the air feel thicker. Not in a bad way though.
The air just feels different. Like a tight hug or grandma's house.
If you haven't noticed, Yeonjun loves Christmas and it makes his heart feel warm. He can't explain it, he's never been good at expressing his feelings. But he's happy and that's what truly matters.

They sit down on a bench looking at the decoratives of the cities, empty cups in their hands when it happens.

Tallguy is passing by and he looks at him. Yeonjun swears he was already looking at him when he notices and that tints his cheeks with a slight blush that could be dismissed as something caused by the cold air. It happens so fast that Yeonjun isn't even sure if he has hallucinated it.

But Beomgyu waves at the boy next to tallguy and it happens. Again. Now he has his big eyes looking back at Yeonjun's once again and he hates how it makes him feel so small.
It doesn't last more than 1 second, but he feels like he's been caught red-handed. Like the boy looked through him.

He knows tallguy knows who he is. He could feel it. During the brief gaze he could feel the time stop for a little and the taller's eyes betrayed his apparently calm expression. Like he hesitated.

Like he wanted to say hi. Do something.

If Yeonjun looked more carefully, he would've noticed how said guy chewed on his lip and looked down afterwards, shyness making his steps less firm.

If Yeonjun stared a little bit more, just a few milliseconds more, he could have even seen how his face heated up.

But he didn't, so he thinks tallguy thinks he's an idiot.

Beomgyu is speaking again but Yeonjun's not listening. Should he ask his friend? Would it be too obvious? Did his friends notice how his leg is on a nervous twitch? Is he still blushing?

He can't wait.

He decides to interrupt. 'Hey Beomgyu, who was that?'

Said boy shuts silent and pays attention to the older. He simply answers 'Oh, we used to go to the same class back in highschool. His name is Taehyun.' he clarifies. But Yeonjun wasn't pleased with the answer.

'No, I mean. I meant the boy next to him.' Yeonjun replies fast, eyes bigger as he leans in, waiting for the answer.
He needs to hear his name.

Beomgyu tilts his head. What is his hyung so impatient about? 'Oh, they're friends. I think he's..?' he furrows his eyebrows, thinking harder.
'Yes, Soobin it is. Why? Do you know him?'

Soobin.

It's cute.

A ghost smile adverts his cheeks. He's surprised at himself. How can something as simple as a name make him so happy?

He doesn't show it though. He can't. So he plays it cool and says he thinks he saw him around and Beomgyu goes back to what he was saying.

That night Yeonjun goes to bed feeling excited about tomorrow morning.