Is It Love?

Chapter 23

"How do you plan to celebrate bringing in 1994?" The interviewer asked.
"In the studio, gearing up for another album." Pac answered. "No parties for you?" The interviewer questioned
Pac shrugged his shoulders in response with agitation of the nonchalant attitude of the interviewer. "Right now, just focusing on the music and movies, until the court dates start to happen."
"What is your mindset going into '94 with the rape and sodomy charges you're faced with and trial dates ahead." The interviewer questioned, shuffling his papers giving Pac a very stern, stoic look angering Pac as he tries to maintain his composure to get through the interview.
"My mindset is to prove that I'm innocent of all the charges against me. People should believe me when I say that, I didn't commit this crime. Everything that I ever did with that girl was consensual, so there is no reason why I would've forced her to anything if it was consensual a few nights prior. There is no reason for me to do this crime, like make that make sense. I'm just not understanding this at ALL. " Pac answered, getting defensive clinching his jaw. "There is no reason for anybody to think I committed this rape charge, and for the ones who think I did, I have no patience for anybody, ANYBODY, who thinks I did this crime." Pac continued, venting out his frustrations at the interviewer who clearly believes that he's guilty because of the indirect statements he made that are geared toward his image and thug persona.
"That's how you feel?" The interviewer asked. Pac leaned up from the chair, looking directly at the interviewer, "It's exactly how I feel!"
~
February '94
"Man, I'm glad we got this break. I'm exhausted." Tish breathed, grabbing her bags from Janet's car. "Me too, Tish. The first couple days, I will be catching up on some sleep." Janet chuckled, grabbing her key and unlocking the door, "Home, sweet, home." Janet sighed. "Um, Janet thanks for letting me stay with you, you didn't have to do this." Tish said, as she and Janet were walking into the house. Janet would always overhear Tish talk about she didn't want to go back to South Central because of the gang violence, so she offered that Tish stay with her since she was living alone and also she considered Tish to be the little sister she never had.
"You don't have to thank me Tish, really you don't. I wanted to do this, you're like a little sister to me and besides it'll be nice to have somebody else living here with me." Janet spoked, walking Tish to some downstairs rooms. "There's two rooms downstairs and three upstairs" They walked into the first room, which was one of the biggest room in the house. "Jay, this room bout the size of my whole house. Yeah, we don't need to look no further, this is the one." Tish joked, walking toward the bed and feeling the lavender-colored comforter. Janet chuckled, "Are you sure?" Tish gave Janet a flabbergasted look as she started to unzip her suitcase. "Jay, yes I'm very sure. Now, while I'm unpacking, you need take your bags and butt upstairs and get some rest because you have a big weekend ahead at the Oscars." Tish stated, walking Janet out the room into the hallway. "Really Tish!" Janet chuckled, "You're something else girl. This break should be fun." Janet started to walk slowly and head upstairs to unpack. As she grabbed her bags and walked up the stairs, she sighed as she opened the door to her room, dropping her bags at the door and trailing to her bed, pulling her messy ponytail letting her hair fall free down her shoulders. Janet lays down on her bed closing her eyes with her mind in a trance, relieve to have a break from the tour and finally rest her body and spend some much needed time to herself. With her body and mind at ease, Janet fell asleep in a fetal-like position like a baby in a mother womb.
~
"What you trying to do tonight? Movies? Clubs? Dinner? I mean, what you wanna do?" Shawn asked, walking into the kitchen facing Danielle as she goes through her mail. "Um, it doesn't matter?" Danielle said yawning in between the words, shuffling though the mail on the counter. "Someone's tired." Shawn stated, watching Danielle constantly yawned every other second. "Babe, no I'm not. We can go somewhere." She responded, trying to convince Shawn differently, "Just give me a second and we can go somewhere." She spoke, putting down the mail on the counter and walking toward the hallway. David chuckled to himself at Danielle trying to convince him that she's not too tired to go out. "Baby. Bab..Danielle, it's fine." Shawn insisted, grabbing her hand before she made to the hallway, turning her around to face him. "It's okay, besides you've had a long day at work. And look at you, you're all tired." Shawn observed, pulling Danielle closer to him. "Shawn, really I'm fi..". Danielle was cut off by Shawn passionately kissing her. A kiss that Danielle didn't shy away from either, putting her arms around his neck with Shawn wrapping his hands around her tiny frame. The kiss eventually broke away with Shawn pecking her lips and gazing into her eyes, admiring her beauty. Danielle gazed right back with a look of lust and desire for Shawn. "So, you think you can just kiss me like that and I'll just change my mind." She flirted, playing with Shawn's blue-jean jacket collar sliding her hands down to his stomach feeling his abs. Shawn smirked, "Yep. And it worked. So, um I suggest you, uhh," He paused, walking away to grab the telephone with flirtatious in his eye looking at Danielle, "get comfortable, while I order this pizza. Now, go on and get undress girl." He teased, motioning her to the bedroom as he focus on the numbers to order a pizza. "Uh,yeah...let me get.."
~
"Janet..Janet." He whispered, softly kissing her cheeks moving down to her neck. "Jan, baby wake up." He continued, causing Janet to moan and grumble because she was interrupted out of her sleep. "Gary....hey baby." She softly moaned, pulling herself up, pushing her back against the headboard. "How did you get in?" She questioned, as she yawned still adjusting to being woken up. "Tish, let me in." Gary replied, "so y'all living together now. That's good to hear." Janet smiled, "Yeah, she lives with me now. I overheard her say she wanted to get away from South Central, so I just ask her if she wanted to stay with me for awhile and she said yes, well...I didn't give her much of a choice." She chuckled, thinking back on the funny memory, "I can believe it. You love that control." Gary replied as he gave a flirtatious smirk. "Shut up Gary." She joked, striking his arm. "What, I'm just saying Jan!" He laughed, pulling her into in him as wrapped his arms around her, showering her face with kisses. "Come here you little feisty thang." He breathed, as she turned her body around to face him. He leaned down and gently kissed her lips with Janet kissing him back, leaning her body down to his, intensifying the sweet kiss even more, as Gary caressed his hands down Janet's spine, "Am I still feisty?" Janet breathed, looking into his green hazel eyes. "Very much so." He breathed, pulling her close taking in her aura, while he pulled her loose curls away from her face. "I missed you...quite a lot." He chuckled, embarrassed he admitted that out loud, making Janet laugh as she went in to give a soft kiss "I missed you too."
~
"What can we do as of right now, because I'm running out. This shit is crazy man. My life is so fucked up. I gotta pay these lawyers all of this money for a crime everybody knows I didn't commit. I got a family that depends on me, on me man and y'all telling me to calm down. Fuck calming down." Pac blasted out, with such raw emotion as he slams his fists on the table. "I don't know, I don't know what I gotta do t..." Pac sighed, in exhaustion of dealing with the lawyers and the courts.
"Pac, you just gotta have faith in the system." One of the executives stated.
Pac begin to scoff at his statement as stood up from the chair stepping away from the table. "You know what's different between me and you? let me tell you, this system, this American system doesn't give a damn about me. In the eyes of these white folks, I'm guilty regardless of what I say or what the evidence shows. But you, a white man, can do the same crime and nothing will happen to you, maybe a little community service, a 6 month jail sentence and that's it for you. But for me, a NIGGA, that last thing they want for me is to be free." The room uttered in complete silence by PAC's emotional expression. "Tupac." One of the executives coughed, slowly standing up from his chair. "I see you, I hear you loud and clear, but the truth of the matter is since this case not everybody wants to deal with the controversy." Pac began to become for agitated, putting his hand over his head in frustration. "However, you got a movie coming out with a soundtrack single and we're gonna push that record in heavy rotation. Pac, remember you got more people for you than against you. Change the narrative."
...
"God, show me the way because I'm lost" Pac breathed, walking out of the Interscope building. For Pac, it seemed like everyday was test to his faith. He has good day and bad days. Days where he wants to end it all and days where he's given reasons to push through. "Let's be out." He said, telling Rob who was leaning against the car. "How'd it go, Pac." Rob asked, as he was opened the passenger door getting into the car. Pac scoffed, "Nothing, I haven't already heard." Pac key in the ignition and speeding into the traffic. Pac and Rob small talked throughout the drive, catching up in the ways guys do. "Shit, everybody always talking about the shit I do, but nigga you worst than me." Pac chuckled, "On everything, ya ass laughing cuz you know I'm being real." Rob shrugged his shoulders disagreeing with Pac. "Nigga, it's bout the same. We both some crazy, wild motherfuckers, hell maybe worse." Pac started laughing, "Nigga, you think. Yo, we done grew up little bit though. I'll give us that. Man, bet E gotta lot to do with that though, with yo sprung ass." Pac joked, as Rob smirked with his shoulders shrugged, "Aye man, I'm just trying do right this time. I could care less." Rob responded, shrugging his shoulders. "Aye man, I'm just fucking with ya. Erica, she a good one, a real one. Man, just keep her happy.
~
The Next Day...
"Janet, Janet..Jay." He shouted, as he muted the Lakers game waiting to get a response from her. "I know this girl hear me calling her." Pac whispered to himself, standing up from the couch and walking up the stairs, entering into her room finding her on her bed legs crossed, reading a book. "Jay, you wanna watch this Lakers game downstairs?" Pac asked, as he sat on the corner of the end. "No, I'm good." Janet dryly answered, giving Pac no eye contact or emotion, catching Pac off-guard with her dry response. "Um, you wanna tell me why you been all nonchalant today." He questioned. Ignoring Pac, Janet closed her book, walked toward the mirror and began fixing her hair, which started to agitate Pac. "So you really finna do this shit right now. This ignore me shi.., Y'know I could've stay at home, instead of dealing with this bullshit." Pac snapped, looking at Janet in the mirror. "Fuck you Lesane!" Janet uttered, storming out of the room walking down the stairs with Pac following behind her. "Nah, say what you gotta say." Pac semi-yelled, as he followed her into the kitchen. "Why does it matter? It's not like my feelings matter to you." Janet spoke, finally expressing what she was feeling. "What the fuck? Jay, you know that's not true..Why would you even think that?" Pac mumbled, walking toward Janet. "Because you blew off my event for your friends, and you knew I really wanted you to be there." Pac began to rubbing his head in reaction to what Janet said, knowing she had a point. "Jay, I didn't think it was a big deal. It has been plenty of times where I wasn't able to make it to certain things and you didn't trip.." Janet walked over to fridge grabbing a bottled water, "whatever Pac." She mumbled, walking away from the kitchen, dismissing the conversation. Pac grabbed by her hand, pulling her into him. "Now look, we're gonna talk about this shit right now because we're not about to be into it all day. Now, talk to me Jay." He urged her, as Janet let a deep sigh, "My parents were going to be there Pac, and I needed you to be there to support me." Janet uttered, "I didn't know Jay, you should've told me they were going to be there." Pac spoke, interlocking Janet's hand as he stared into her brown eyes. "I didn't think I had to say that, but maybe I should have, instead of assuming. I'm sorry." Janet mumbled, interlocking Pac's free hand into hers. "I'm sorry too, Y'know I could've went about that a little better, but still I'm learning." Pac spoke, giving away a slight smirk as he leaned her body into him causing Janet to let out a smile. "I swear, I can't stand you sometimes." She chuckled, playfully rolling her eyes, caressing his face staring into his brown kind eyes. "I love you too Damita Jo." He bubbled, in response to her calling him 'Lesane' when she was upset. "Oh, that what we doing now." She joked, pulling closer into him, as he placed her hands around his neck. "Yep, guess we even now." He mumbled above a whisper, leaning forward sneaking in a quick kiss. "I knew it was coming, you just can't keep your lips off me." Janet stated, causing them both to laugh. "Like you ain't the same way, you be all over this body every chance you get." He said, lifting up his shirt exposing his abs. "Well, it's mine, both in public and in private." She purred flirtatiously, feeling on his abs while leaning forward inching closer to his lips. "Always wi...."
"Janet Janet Janet."
Interrupted from the flashback hearing the voice of Tish calling her name. "Jan, girl.." She chuckled, with slight concern waving her hand in Janet's face to get her attention. "Oh, ye-yeah..I'm sorry." Janet coughed, focusing back into reality as she shifted all of her attention to Tish.
"Girl, it's cool. You just scared for a second, it's like you went into a deep thought or daydreaming. Is there something on your mind Jan?" Tish asked, propping herself onto the bed. "No, just trying to be fully prepared for tonight, that's all." She lied, hesitating to really express what she was thinking at the moment, as she walking unto the bed, pulling her hands through her curls. "Just thinking bout this performance girl, but what bout you miss thang, I been seeing you and David, so what's going with that." Tish started to smile as she join Janet unto the bed, "I just love how you switch this around on me." Janet started to laugh, playfully shrugging her shoulders, "Well...I had to ask, so give me all the deets."
"It's fun. We're just enjoying each other company, just taking it slow and seeing where it goes" Janet began to smile as she watched and listened to Tish talk about her newfound romance. "I'm happy that you're experiencing this Tish. You're glowing, you're happy...I'm happy for you Tish. You deserved to be happy."
"So do you, Jan. You're such a beautiful person inside and out. You're deserving of it all too." Tish said, in response to Janet. Tish and Janet continued to have deep girl talk with topics ranging from tour, tv shows, fashion, and guys. "I don't know Tish, a tattoo?" Janet uttered, getting off the bed as she heard the sounds of the doorbell. "Jan, it's not that bad. It's no different than a piercing." Tish said, following behind Janet as they walked down the stairs making their way into the living room as Janet walked and opened the door, allowing the entourage of makeup and wardrobe to come in and get acquainted in the master guest room, which was open space for everyone to move around freely. "Looks like you're about to busy for the rest of the day with all of this. What time you gotta be at the red carpet tonight?" Tish asked, as she motioned and pointed to the entourage where the guest room was. "Two hours early for red carpet pictures and interviews and whatever else they want me to do, but Gary supposed to meet me there, along with Jim and Terry, but he never gave a sure answer." Tish gave out a light chuckle while shaking her head at Janet, "Girl, you know that man is coming with you, he's too sprung on you not to go."
~
"Play the shit back man, this next album gotta be the hottest shit that comes out next year. We don't have time to be slowing down and sleeping, we finish one song, okay we listen to it real quick then we on to the next one." Pac sputtered, coming out the booth speaking to Johnny P and several others that were in the studio. "We don't have time to waste right now, it all about creating shit that'll last fucking forever." Pac continued, as he lights the cigarette motioning someone to pass him a cup of Hennessy as he sat down in a chair that was next to Johnny. "Drinking kinda early don't you think?" a soft voice questioned, causing Pac to look up in curiosity to see who it was questioning him, which appeared to be a small frame, caramel skin beauty with a pixie cut, as she handed him a cup. "I might be. I didn't think it was a crime to drink early in a studio session." He answered, taking a sip setting his eyes on her, causing her to blush. "It's not, just a thought." She mumbled, walking out the session, leaving Pac intrigued and focused on her until he didn't see her in sight anymore.
~
Meanwhile on the other end of the city. Janet just finished her performance at the Oscars and left early with Gary and celebrated the special night with an intimate dinner at a private restaurant. "You were amazing tonight Janet. I mean... just beautiful to see." Gary cooed, giving Janet all of her flowers, "Thank you Gary." Janet smiled, pecking him a soft kiss, "You're welcome babe." Gary replied, staring into her eyes while caressing her hand. With the flowing conversation between the two, they were able to connect more since Janet had a break away from the tour. "I'm glad I have you for a little while, now maybe we'll be able to catch up on some things." Gary flirted, pulling back his chair as he stand pulling his dreads away from his face, extending his hand out as Janet connected her hand to his. "Well, let get out of here." Janet beamed, as they started exiting out of the restaurant. "Oh, let me run to this restroom real quick Jan!" Gary spoke, disconnecting his hands away from Janet to walk towards the bathroom. "Yeah, okay. Go ahead." Janet breathed, as she stood in trance watching Gary walk into the restroom. "Come on, come on....it gotta be one more in this pocket. Aaahh fuck, damn." He sighed, stuffing out his pockets and unbuttoning his suit looking inside his suit pocket very rapidly. "Whewww! Finally, I need to pop this and hurry back." He sighed, urging himself to speed up to avoid from keeping Janet waiting. As he let out a long, deep sigh while looking at himself in the mirror, Gary begins to straighten and button up his suit and make himself look presentable the same way that Janet saw him. "Alright, everything looks the same way." He mumbled, looking at his reflection brushing against his suit, making his way out the door, creeping up slowly behind Janet. "I'm back, sorry it took awhile." He uttered, pecking her kiss on the cheek as Janet turned around and smiled. "It's okay, just ready to go home." She jested, longing for his hand as she noticing Gary's eyes are beginning to look heavy, which Gary caught Janet staring at, causing him come up with an immediate response, "They been irritating me all day. It's probably just from all the different lights tonight." Gary commented to ease Janet's thought away from anything she might have been thinking. "Oh okay. Well, maybe I can nurse you tonight and make it feel better?" She flirted, as they headed toward valet parking, causing Gary to chuckle, "I like that." He laughed, as he got the keys from the valet guy, "Come on, let's get you home tonight." He spoke, realizing that they drug sensitivity was kicking in, which was strobing his physical effect in which Janet will never have no idea about.