The Choices We Make (Snow White With Red Hair Fanfiction)

Chapter 20

I don't know how I was feeling. I was sad. I was angry. I was disapointed. Most of all, I was numb. I never wanted something like this to happen ever again. I hated it. I hated being helpless. I hated the knot of a sore stomach. I hated being stuck in bed. But I couldn't share any of that. I was strong. I wasn't phased by something so petty.

If I was alone, I would have happily vented my frustration. But I was not. The room which I was completely unfamiliar with was crowded. There was my sister, her boss Garak, an herbalist I hadn't met before, the princes, Izana and Zen, the aids Kiki Mitsuhide and Obi.

All were watching me while I just wanted to curl up under the blankets. Garak had just finished running a few minors tests on me, and was about to leave. Before she did she turned to the group of observers. "Let's go easy on her shall we," she scolded them all. "Only one or two for today. While she's conscious, Akarozu still needs rest."

I glanced to my sister, begging her silently not to leave. I'm sure Izana would be one of the first to stay. I don't know what happened yet, and I'm scared to hear what he has to say. For all I know he could construe it to have me trust him, and all those around to believe that truth as well. The only one I could trust was Shirayuki, my own sister.

Everyone else left. Izana was, of course, the last to leave. I was just glad he left.

There was just me and my sister. I relaxed around her, showing just how distressed I was. I had so many questions to ask her, but I couldn't bring myself to speak.

"You've been asleep for over a month," Yuki started answering them for me. I'm glad she knew me so well. "Izana wasn't the one who poisened you. A suitor wished to get hom sick in order for her to nurse him back to health and gain is favor. The herb reacted with something left in you body, and caused a severe reaction. Had it been anyone else it would just be a bad stomache."

I brought my knees up to my chest, wanting to hug something, but to frightened to grab a pillow from. The luxerious bed I was currently in.

This was all because of me. Cause of my recklessness. All the times I've been poisoned, you'd think I'd be immune. But no, cause of all these toxins stuck in my body, I just keep gathering more. I should just stop trying if this is how it's going to be.

Shirayuli crawled up to sit right next to me. She proceeded to tell me of all that had happened while I was asleep. Every little detail she could remeber she told me. I just sat there and listened to what I missed. Sad that I missed it, but happy she found even the minor details she found were something to be told. Yet through all she told me, it seemed like she was hiding something from me. I didn't really care. If she was hiding something from me, it was for a good reason.

Slowly she ran out of things to tell me. We then sat in silence for a moment, just leaning against each other. A small fake gag came from my sister. "You smell," she joked, trying to treat everything as if it were normal. "I'll go find someone to get a bath ran for you. I'll be right back." Shirayuki knew I didn't want to be alone.

She quickly returned, and not long after a set of maids came in with a baisin. We just sat there and watched as the two heated up water for me. It was strange usually I'd do it myself. Or even just find the nearest body of water.

"The bath is ready, M'lady," the older maid said, setting a cloth and bar of soap on the table. "Would you like assistance?"

The thought of someone else bathing me, let alone seeing me naked, frightened me. "We got it," Yuki answered for me.

She stood by my side in support as I walked on shaky legs to the tub. Once I wa safely there, she turned her back to me, to give me privacy. I discarded the unfamiliar nightgown and slowly lowered myself into the warm water, feeling the trim wash away.

"There is one thing I didn't tell you about," she sighed. "On the day it happen, Prince Izana carried you in his arms to us. Garak asked of his relationship to you, as none of us told her what was going on with you, she never asked anyways. But he said you were going to be his wife."

I froze in my action. I knew of his own personal plans but I never agreed to it. With him telling someone else, there must be reprocutions.

Yuki took a pause, probably to think of what to say next. "I know you didn't agree to marriage. You were frighten to... Friendship... maybe."

"Yuki," I gasped out. My voice wasn't used to being used. But she needed to stop rambling on and get to the point.

"Everyone speaks of you as if you are his fiancé," she told me, ripping it off like a bandage. "It doesn't help that Prince Izana doesn't deny the claims."

Of course he wouldn't clarify to anyone. It's very noble of him. Everyone believes us to be married, his goal in this all. So why deny it as it not true. If everyone believes it to be so, it will become the truth. If I hadn't waken up, would he have married me while I was still unconscious.

"You need to recover fist," Shirayuki scolded me, "I didn't want to tell you, cause you just woke up. But it's better than you finding out some other way."