Self-Discovery

Chapter 2

2006... Minjun had just gotten out of his English class and was walking hurriedly across campus to his Algebra class. Not looking as he was trying to organize his books he bumped into someone causing him to fall backwards.

"Aish." He cursed.

"I'm sorry."The person said as he scurried to collect Minjun's books and papers from the ground. With the books in one hand, he reached out to help Minjun stand back to his feet. Minjun looked up at the hand and saw the most handsome face. He forgot all about hurting his butt and fell into a trance.

"Please let me help you up." The young man said still reaching out. Minjun woke from his trance and took the other guy's hand. Now on his feet Minjun dusted his butt off.

"Hey, I am really sorry, I wasn't watching-"

"It's ok, Minjun started taking his books and papers, you must be the guy from Thailand that everyone has been talking about." The young man smiled.

"Yes, that's me, he said, how could you tell?"

"Oh I just kind of figured, Minjun stated, since you are speaking English and all." Minjun didn't want to say it's because the rumors about the Thai boy were all about him be the most good looking guy on campus and were true. Minjun was smitten.

"I'm Nichkhun." He held out his hand again to Minjun.

"Minjun." Shook the other's hand. He finally had his things organized and had his back pack on his back.

"Well, I am going to get some coffee, you want to join me." Nichkhun offered. Minjun knew he needed to get to his Algebra class but he hated algebra and Nichkhun was so attractive he couldn't pass up the opportunity for an impromptu date with the hottest guy on campus. The two walked to the nearby café.

"What do you like?" Nichkhun asked Minjun.

"Sweet Iced Americano." Minjun answered.

"Oh that's funny I love that too." Nichkhun said. Nichkhun ordered and pulled out his credit card to pay.

"Oh I can pay for-" Minjun started.

"No it the least I can do after knocking you down." Nichkhun said and paid for the drinks.

"It was just as much my fault." Minjun told him.

"Its all good." Nichkhun smiled. Minjun melted. He knew he was in trouble as it was so easy for him to fall in love. The pair sat and talked about school and decided to be study partners. Nichkhun expressed he was an ace in Algebra, but doing horrible with Korean Studies. Minjun told him he could help with that. From that day the two were almost inseparable and Minjun was head over heels in love with Nichkhun, but stayed silent. Even through all of Nichkhun's dates. Minjun just wanted to be a good friend especially since his friend wasn't gay. Nichkhun really didn't know what he was doing to Minjun during their study sessions. Minjun admired everything about the creamy skinned Thai boy. From his brown lofty curls to the way his Adam's apple moved as he drank water. It wasn't long before Khun was infiltrating Minjun's dreams which lead to nocturnal emissions. Every now and then he thought maybe he should come clean about his feelings, but he was always too scared. He cared more about the friendship than trying to have a romantic relationship. He hoped Khun didn't notice him staring longer than he should or notice when he was semi erect after staring for too long in admiration. Two years went by without incident until one night after a date Nichkhun showed up at Minjun's. It was pouring raining that night and Khun was at the door of Minjun's studio apartment soaking wet.

"Bro what are you doing here?" Minjun asked pulling Khun inside.

"We broke up, Nichkhun was shivering, Tiffany broke up with me."

"Aww man I am sorry to hear that, Minjun started, you need to take off those wet clothes, I have some extras." He went to grab extra PJs and a tee shirt. When he turned Khun was standing there in just his boxers. Minjun gulped at the sight and tried to stop his body's natural reaction of carnal instinct.

"Here." Minjun handed Khun the clothes and turned away. Suddenly, Minjun felt arms embrace him.

"Minjunnie, my heart aches." Nichkhun whispered.

"Khun, have you been drinking?" Minjun asked smelling the soju on his friend's breath. But he knew Khun and he knew he wasn't drunk.

"Minjun, help me." He still had Minjun embraced in his arms.

"How can I help you?" Minjun asked his heart was racing and then he felt something he never thought he would feel in his life. Khun softly kissing his neck. Minjun wanted to accepted it, but remained stoic. He was scared that his friend wasn't thinking properly. Khun turned Minjun around to face him. Minjun wouldn't let his eyes meet Khun's.

"What, Khun asked, I know Minjun, I know." Khun caressed Minjun's face making Minjun look him in the eyes. Minjun's heart dropped at the realization of what his friend was saying, but he also took it as an invitation. Just as if he were a beast he lunged for Nichkhun. He couldn't hold back. Before he knew it he had Khun pinned against the wall as he kissed his friend on the lips. The pair entangled in desire fell on the nearby bed. Minjun lost himself as he was finally able to make love to his best friend. He tried to slow himself down, his fantasy was to be more sensual with Khun, but he never thought this would actually happened. Even after both men were satisfied having climaxed Minjun thought it had all been a dream until he woke with Khun lying next to him sleeping like the little prince and then the memory of their passion returned to his mind. Minjun smiled and hugged Khun tight. Khun opened his eyes looking up at Minjun. At first he seemed happy, but it was almost as if something terrible had happened and he jumped up.

"Khunnie, what's wrong?" Minjun asked.

"Minjun, oh my god, was I drunk last night?" Khun asked holding his head.

"It didn't seem like it, Minjun ejected, you have always been able to hold your liquor."

"Minjun...Khun started...I, I,-"

"How long have you been gay Khun?"Minjun asked calmly. Khun sighed and with his head in his hand he said: "I'm not sure, it's been a thought in my mind for a while now, I've been trying to fight it."

"And after last night are you sure now?" Minjun asked. Nichkhun was quiet then said:

"Yes, I am."

"How long have you known about me?" Minjun asked.

"Its been a long time, Minjun, Nichkhun answered, and I have to thank you for being my very bestest friend and helping me, I can finally be open and come to terms with my reality." Khun patted Minjun's shoulder. Minjun grabbed Khun's hand.

"So we are still friends or are we-"

"We are still friends." Khun said.

"Okay." Minjun said.

"I've got to get going." Nichkhun said grabbing his underwear from the floor and finding his clothes. Minjun sat quietly watching Khun dress.

"Hey, are you still coming with me to play golf?" Nichkhun asked as he was putting his shirt on. Minjun couldn't believe how nonchalant Khun was acting after they had had such an intimate night.

"Minjun!" Nichkhun said to get Minjun's attention.

"Oh sure bro." Minjun replied grabbing a magazine from his night stand, laying back with an arm behind his head. He tried to seem just as cool and nonchalant as Khun, but his heart was breaking.

"Cool, I'll call you, Khun said going to the door, see ya." The prince left and pauper broke down and cried. Neither man spoke a word of that night again. Minjun felt used but excused his friend's behavior after all they were best friends. Minjun went back to being Nichkhun's quiet sidekick always hoping that one day Khunnie would come to him again, that is until Nichkhun met Woo Young and for the first time Minjun realized he was going to lose the love of his life and his bestfriend.