Lover

Chapter 6. "Enough For Today... Please?"

Taylor's POV:

After Andrea left, things went by pretty quickly. Joe had an appointment for his upcoming movie A Christmas Carol. It was releasing this Christmas so all the hype and promotion was going on strong. He filmed the movie in July, and I always laughed when he mentioned how hot it actually was but they had to pretend it was freezing cold. The movie doesn't give off any July vibes though. That's what you get when you have to make a movie about Christmas.

We didn't talk about the fight again or the fact that Andrea knew about it and that meant my father and Austin knew too. And that meant Joe's family had somehow gotten a whiff of it too. Hopefully, they don't ask us about it. I don't want to recall anything right now. It was one of our worst fights this year. And I could see that Joe was not himself after it. He seemed a little distance and closed off. Like he was scared or something. I wanted to make things clear but not today. We had enough of today.

I was home alone. Joe was at the CBS show, where he was giving interviews with his co-star Guy Pearce. I wanted to come along but Joe insisted that I should stay at home, at least for today until I fully recover. I didn't want him to worry anymore so I stayed behind, missing him terribly.

It was 5 in the evening now. I was chewing on the leftover enchiladas that I made in the afternoon, staring uninterested on the television screen. Without Joe, it was so quiet. I couldn't find interest in anything. I tried to find something interesting to watch, flickering through the channels and going through the movie DVDs but all in vain. I sighed in frustration and slumped on the couch.

I stared at the empty space on the couch where Joe would be sitting if he was here. I used to leave an empty space on the right side of the couch whenever we watched T.V or a movie. Slowly that action became a permanent habit. Now even when he was not around I always left his side empty, only to be filled by him. The only thing that saved me from breaking down was knowing that he'll be here. Sooner or later he'll come back.

And only that, somehow gave me a reason to live...

*************

Tick, tick, tick...

It was 9:30 ticking on the wall clock, as I laid in bed staring at it sadly. It was too late. Well too late for me because I was missing Joe. I don't know how long he'll take. I called him two hours ago and he told me that he was still busy and a couple of more errands were left to run until he returns back home. He told me to go to sleep, but I couldn't. I can't. If I was at my parents' house maybe I could but alone... it's too quiet. Too... scary.

I know I sound like a child when I say, I am scared of being left alone. It wasn't a very huge problem for me because I was barely ever left alone. But ever since I moved in with Joe, this occasion happens more than I can bear. I haven't told anyone about this yet, but it started to grow in the last couple of months even more. Maybe it was because of our fight that night when he left without telling me. I don't want to recall anything right now. It still freaks me out. But after that, I made sure I wasn't alone for too long or I would start to freak out. I didn't tell Joe that. I tried to play it cool whenever he was gone. Or I called Selena or my other close friends if they were in town to come by, so I won't feel the scary rush kicking in.

I was glad Andrea left the cats here before she went to the airport. She called at six telling me that she'll be heading to the airport with my dad and will be dropping the cats off here on her way. Thankfully, our house was on the way to the airport so Scott didn't have to drive further.

The cats helped in this process a lot. They made me feel a little bit better. And their presence didn't let that fear sink in me. I was glad I adopted Benji because he always followed me around. I was never in a room where Benjamin wasn't. He chased me around like a little puppy and I appreciated his presence a lot. Olivia and Meredith were old golds, they were no less to me. I loved my cats with heart because they've been through everything with me. Well, not technically or physically or maybe not emotionally but they were always there and I was quite grateful for it.