The Broken Daylily

CHAPTER EIGHT: The estate

Madilyn woke up that morning with the knowledge that she was someone's wife now, and that soon, she would be someone's mother.

That first thought frightened her more than that second. Mayhap that was because her husband was already in her life, while the child was still to come. But either way, she did not like the way her life had made such a sudden turn.

She did not think lord Thomas was a bad man. Her parents had always spoken good about their family – ignoring their lack of meeting the rules. But even if you thought of that, you would come to realize that they did not break the rules to be rebels. They had just made their own rules, putting their family first.

Madilyn envied that. But she had lived her entire live growing up to please the ton, so she could not say if it was fun to break those rules. The only rule she had broken, had been a terrible disaster with horrible consequences – her current life.

She turned around in her bed and looked out the window. She was quite certain lord Thomas had given her this room because it was the farthest away from his. But honestly, she did not mind it. The room seemed nice and well maintained, and she did not feel the need to sleep close to her husband.

The garden seemed nice. She stood up from the bed and walked to the window. She had a beautiful view of a huge garden, surrounded by walls that were hidden behind plants. There was a paved path that led from the house to an arbour, and further on to a small door hidden between the bushes. But what was behind that, she could not see.

Since there was no maid to help her dress, she chose her own gown – a white cuff sleeved dress with red dots – and put it on. It took her longer than it would with a maid, but she was not bothered by it. The longer she could stay in her room and not see lord Thomas, the better her day might be.

Though she feared she would not be able to live so alone for the rest of her life, she ought to enjoy the moments she could. And now she was too unhappy to bother about being around people.

When she was finished dressing, she walked to the mirror and looked at herself. Her dark blond hair was getting lighter as summer was coming. But it looked messy – just like how she felt. Her skin was pale and her lips were in a tight stripe. She did not feel a smile come up when she watched herself in that mirror.

If she would be watching someone else looking like that, she would feel pity. She truly looked like she was miserable and unhappy, and she feared it would be hard to get out of that dark hole.

She sighed, then took the brush and started brushing her hair. It did not make her look any prettier or happier, but at least she looked well enough to meet her husband for breakfast. She took the red ribbon and looked at her hair. She usually had a maid who made her hair beautiful, and Madilyn must admit she did not even know how to make a simple braid.

With another sigh, she took all her hair and tied it together with the ribbon. She was not to go out and meet people today, so she was not bothered by her simple look.

Finally she was ready and walked out of her room. She made her way through the hallway to the staircase, following the path she had taken the night before with lord Thomas. She descended the stairs and turned left, hoping she would find the dining room quickly.

The first door she passed was the room that was the closest to the front door, so Madilyn assumed that was the parlour. She passed a second door and opened it, but it was only the sitting room. The third door she opened was finally the dinning room. Twas a dark wooden room with a large, light brown table in the centre, surrounded by purple chairs. A white fireplace was on one side of the room, and on other side was a cupboard from a third sort of wood.

It was the most hideous room Madilyn had ever seen.

Ignoring the ugliness the chamber held, she walked toward the table. Two sets of plates were prepared, yet no one was here. She decided to sit and wait.

After almost five minutes, a side door opened and the butler entered the room.

"My lady," he said while bowing. Then he carried inside a tray of food and placed it on the table. "Lord Thomas has only just woken up. He asked me to tell you that you should not wait for him."

With another curtsied, he turned around to leave the room.

"Wait," Madilyn said, stopping him before opening the door and disappearing in the hallway. She blinked a few times, wondering what it really was she wanted to ask. Company? When lord Thomas would be here for breakfast?

Eventually she swallowed and asked: "I would like to take on a lady's maid."

Without a moment of doubt or surprise, the butler nodded. "I shall take care of it," he said before he turned around and left the room.

Silence suddenly filled the house. Madilyn looked from her plate to the bread on the table, but she did not want to eat. She was used to eating with her parents and Eleanor, and now that she was married, she had expected her to eat with her husband. But here she was, alone in a big room, watching the food that was brought to her by a butler whose name she did not know.

With the hope that the day might go better than it started, she took a piece of bread and started eating.

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After breakfast, she did not know what to do. She had not seen lord Thomas yet, but she did want to search for him. She also did not want to start sewing in the sitting room.

Where even was the sitting room?

She walked from door to door, through many hallways and up the stairs, and discovered every part of the house. The sitting room was next to the parlour, both very majestic and richly decorated. The library contained many book and some paintings. She found the study and the bathroom, and also a dressing room. But her favourite room in the whole house, was the music room.

In the middle stood a grand piano, and near the wall was another – smaller – one. A wonderful harp stood near the fire place, and a violin case was on the floor. There were comfortable looking coaches and some chairs, and big windows to let in a lot of light. The walls were white and yellow curtains matched the chairs. It was a much brighter room than any other in the house.

Seeing the piano, she wanted to play on it. The instrument had been a bigt part of her life for many years, and she was very proud of her musical abilities. But she did not like playing it when people were listening, and in a quiet house like Lindenberg, everyone could hear her play it when she did.

So she shook her head and walked out of the room. Mayhap she should avoid the room, for she would only torture herself when she refused to play. With her head hung low, she found her way to the gardens.

Birds were singing a song as she walked under their tree. The sun shone, but shadows were more prominent. The silence of the fields around the house was a deafening silence – much different from the noises in London. It was odd for her, but it was something she could get used to. Unlike the feelings inside her, that were similar to the outside: a prominent shadow and a deafening silence.

So with a tear falling from her eye, she walked through the garden, lonely and alone.