Unfortunately Yours( In Progressing/Editing/Fine Tuning)

Chapter 4

     THREE YEARS AGO -CARTER

I knock on Vanessa's front door. My chest is in a frenzy, my heart fighting to break free of its cage and join her.
       The door opens and I want to slam my lips into hers. She looks every bit like an angel sent in my time of need. I don't care that she seems to be in a mood of sorts. Her hair is disheveled and her lips are thin. I know she is nervous about tonight.
        I offered to go with her to her parents house. We have spent nearly every moment with each-other for the past month and a half. Each moment was like living in a dream. The feel of her skin beneath my fingers, the sound she makes when I nibble at her neck, the way she gets so mad she could strangle me but it is never enough to stop her from giving in to my extra charms. The charms that claim her whole body as mine.
       "Angel." I lean down and press a kiss to her cheek. An endearing sigh slips off of her lips and I have to control myself. I have to stop myself from claiming her right now in this door way.
       This feeling between us is deadly. It's poison and the river of life trapped in a ball of chaos and I want every last drop of it.
 
        "Are you ready?" My mouth twitches at the pink flush spreading all over her body. It travels to borders I have become very aqauinted with.
       "Come in."  She nudges the door open wider so I can enter. We head straight for her room and she flings herself onto the bed.
       I know by the tenseness of her body this is more than just about her parents. There is something else hidden under that huff of frustration.
       "What's got your knickers in a twist?" I tease sitting beside her. My hand gently brushes up and down her arm and I smile. I dowse myself in the feeling that I am able to bring peace to her as much as she brings peace to me. 
        "I'm not exactly thrilled to be in the middle of their issues again." She nibbles on her lower lip. Her gaze is blank and staring at the ceiling.
        "It's more than that. What's wrong?" I demand. She takes a shuddering breath.
        "Can we talk about it after dinner? It is important. Like monumentally important... But I'm trying to hold myself together." She admits.
        I tug her onto my lap and wrap my arms around her. My heart is racing, afraid that she may have decided she wants nothing more to do with me. But I ignore the stab of panic and focus on her.
        "You don't have to.." she breaths against my chest. 
        "I'd do just about anythin for you." I murmur. I am not surprised by my confession, not surprised by how involved I am with this bundle of madness.
       
When Vanessa said her family was nothing short of a horror story she wasn't joking. From the moment we entered the gigantic house I wanted to murder her dad.
        He was so drunk it was a wonder how he was able to move. Her mum was blubbering like a chided child. Like she had got the whooping of her life and by the looks of the large bruises on her eye she most likely did.
        "You left .." her mum cries. She's clutching on to Vanessa's shoulders as if she were a bullet proof glass. It sickens me that the positions aren't reversed. What mom holds her daughter infront of her instead of shields her behind her.
        "Can you blame me?" Vanessa scoffs. Her dad caught sight of her attitude and made way for Vanessa. I step infront of her towering over the pathetic excuse of a father this bloke is.
        "Touch her and I'll paint the walls with your blood." I say through gritted teeth. My body is throbbing with pint up rage begging to be released on this ass hole.
        Her dad staggers back and seeths. He is non to pleased to be afraid of a twenty one year old that's had his fair share of brawls.
       "Let's go." I say to Vanessa over my shoulder and lead her outside. Her cheeks are stained with tears and she strains to hold back the helpless sobs breaking free from her lips.
        I shoot my mate Kayden a text to call the police to this address. I know Vanessa wants to desperately but is afraid to and doesn't want to betray her cluster fuck of a family. I have no such qualms.
        When we head down the road I take a deep breath. I pressed her petite hand to my lips and kiss it. I feel her body relax almost instantly.
        "I'm... I'm so sorry."
        "Don't apologize!" I snap. I move my hands to the steering wheel and clench them so tight my knuckles blanch. I've never felt so angry, I've never felt so blistering mad that I would rather go to jail than see the likes of that tormented home again.
       I sigh.
        "I don't know how .. I don't know how to deal with these emotions. I want to kill him." I growl.
       She stays quiet and fiddles with her silver necklace.
        The aching silence is interrupted by a phone call. My anxiety spikes to lethal levels. When I see Reggie's name flash across the screen. .
       Why is this happening? Why can't I have a blipping break for the mother of mary the timing couldn't be worse. Especially since I still don't know what Vanessa has to talk to me about.
       "Aren't you going to answer that?" She says in barely a breath. I nod my head reluctantly. I don't have much of a say so in this case.
       "Carter." I hiss in the phone. My nerves are rocking through my body like boulders.
       "Parker needs a gram. He's on 8th street."
        I grind my teeth. I can't do that with her here. I can't.
        "I'm a little busy Reggie, I'll handle it in a bit."
        "No Carter you listen! If you want to get your money and prevent a bullet from lodging into your pretty girlfriends head, yes I know you have it bad for the girl, then you will do what I tell you!"
       He barks.
I slam my fist into the steering wheel and cut a sharp U-turn and head toward 8th Street.
       "What are you doing?" Vanessa's eyes widen in panic and all that I can do is smooth my thumb against hers.
       "It'll just take a second."

       "Don't move." I stare at her hoping to convey the severity of this situation. She gives a stiff nod and I exit my death trap of a car.
       I sling the trunk open and pull out a gram of powder. I am not proud of having to do this. I was reduced to this. If I could live life any other way I would. But for now it's the only way to get fast cash and pay for the things I have to take care of.
       I walk toward Parker and keep my head down in case there are any cameras. You can never be too careful to cover who you conduct your business with and I have so much to lose.
       He hands me a roll of bills and I turn to go on my way, thankful that it was a smooth transaction.
       When I get in the car Vanessa is barely present. Her face is even paler than before, her mouth is set in a hard line and her fists are balled on her lap.
       "What is it?"
She whips her head toward me and I can see more than anger gleaming inside of those black endless eyes.
       "Your a drug dealer?" She snarls. She can barely hold on to her composure.
       "I..." I stutter. Trying to find any words that can dig me out of this six foot deep hole I had carved solely for myself.
       Her chest is rising and falling rapidly. She jerks the door open and vomits. I pushed her to this point, I bled this anxiety into her veins.
       "Take me home." She hisses. She can't look at me and I feel every organ in my body shrivel.
       "It's not what you think Angel." I try but I can see by the flashing rage inside of her eyes that she will hear none of it.
       "I don't care. Take me home." She turns in the chair and holds onto herself as if she is trying to shield herself from me. I'm am at a loss of ideas. How can I get her to see?
       
I follow her up the stairs to her apartment door. She swings around and points a finger into my chest.
       "I should have known. I should have known you were the biggest mistake of my life. Now I have to live with the consequences!"  A horrid scream blasts out of her windpipe it is worse than the cry of a wounded animal.
       "I have to hurt and plead with the heavens to have it easy on me because of you!" She nearly bursts into another round of tears. I am at war with myself. I am absolutely gutted by her acidic words eating my heart but I want to wrap her into to me and squeeze her until she can breath again.
       She is yelling and tears are rolling down her face. The flood gates are open and I know she can barely see me.
       "Angel .. I.."
She cuts off my words and shoves me. Before I can regain my footing she has already slipped inside and  locked the door.
       This isn't the end of us. One minute we are at eachothers throats and the next we are breathing each-other in like starved animals. I'll get through to her. I have to.

The next day I go to Vanessa's apartment and knock.
       There is no answer.
My heart starts jolting with anxiety. I can't leave things this way. Vanessa has become my addiction, the air I breathe, the soul that animates my body.
       I twist the doorknob and to my surprise it opens. A sick feeling twists in my gut as my eyes scan the living room. Everything is gone.
       Not one piece of evidence that they were even here to begin with. A fury so tainted and wicked spirals through me and I slam my fist into the walls. I ignore the strand of agony tugging on my knuckles. I ignore that I can't feel my legs or my arms.
       I feel like passing out, like the world just detonated and I am living in the memory of the dead.
       I float to Vanessa's room and it is barren not a slither of life was left behind. But something catches my eye.
       There is a note stuck to the door of the closet and it has my name written in a hurry across it's face.
       My hand shakes as I extend it and clutch it between my fingers like it is a deadly disease.
       "Dear Carter. I am sorry for the horrible things I said. I am sorry that I have to leave. I will always have a piece of you with me and I  will weep for  the rest of my days knowing that I will never be yours. Please don't try to find me you may not like what you find. Please don't hurt me more than I already am. Unfortunately not Yours, Vanessa Rose Thorn."
       Thorn indeed. A Thorn that rips you open and let's you bleed.