Bus Ride || TaeJinKook ☑️

Confirmation

Stomach Cancer.

I am diagnosed with the disease. The paper in my hand feels like the end of me. My eomma died of the same disease. I could die just like her.

I am meeting secretly with an oncologist for the past few weeks. Only appa knows about my fears. About what could have been. Taehyung is too precious to get hurt. It's not that I don't care about my appa, but if there's someone who could understand me better, that would be him.

"Jin, there's hope." Dr. Lee said. "You should inform your loved ones about this so you can get support. You cannot just keep it a secret."

I shake my head to disagree. "I want to deal with it myself Dr. Lee. I don't want to cause them burdens. Not now that I've caused them a lot. Especially my boyfriend."

"Jin, we need to deliver the baby. You need to start the treatment as soon as possible."

"But I'm not yet in my full term. My OB said the best time would be the 34th. I can wait until the 34th week." I countered.

"We can start the treatment while your pregnant. I can discuss the protocol to your OB. We can work hand in hand so as not to post a risk to the child."

"No." I disagree. "I cannot risk the safety of my child. I can wait. 34 weeks is just a few weeks away. I can wait."

The doctor sighs. I know I've been hard-headed lately. But this is my body. I am carrying a life inside me. My Soobin is the most important above all else. If there is no guarantee that the treatment won't post a risk to my child, I will not undergo any treatment.

"Jin, your cancer cells are aggressive. It has metastasized to your other organs. I saw some on your liver and intestine. Jin, you can deliver the baby on the 34th but your life is at risk. Your cancer may be too hard to control by that time."

My heart hurts. I am looking forward to meeting my Soobin soon but it seems as if I would be able to hold him for just a short while. But is that important? What's important is that I will deliver him alive and healthy.

"Doctor, will cancer affect my baby?"

"No, Jin. It won't."

I breathe out. "Then I won't get the treatment. I will wait. I don't want to deliver my baby now that he has to end in NICU to grow and develop. He should develop inside me as he should. 34 weeks is better, right? There's a higher chance that he won't end up in NICU. Just please ensure that I will give birth to him alive and healthy."

I walk out of the hospital with a heavy heart. Apart from my appa, it's Taehyung who loves me the most. How can I tell him about this? That I'm going to die soon? That I'm going to leave our Soobin to him?

I thought I already found the happiness that I am waiting for. I do found it with Taehyung. To the point that I cannot see him hurting because of me again.

"Jin?" My best friend. With a paper bag in his hands. He's looking at me from head to foot. I know it's been a while.

"Have you talked to Mr. Jeon?" Yoongi asked. He brought me to his new apartment. It's smaller than the unit we used to share before.

I also learned that he already resigned from Jungkook's company and is now working as a freelance graphic artist. He said his income is not as high as before but the stress is lesser as he needs to work for one project at a time. And he can choose which project to accept.

"I tried but he doesn't want to talk to me." I took a biscuit from the plate. I haven't taken my lunch yet.

Yoongi looks at me in surprise. "I don't think that's true. He's going crazy looking for you. He even invited me to his office to inquire about you."

"When was that?" I asked. I learned not to take it seriously. I don't want to get hurt again.

"Three months after you left. Believe me Jin, he looks miserable!" Yoongi gives me a bottle of juice.

My emotions start to mess up again. I'm now okay with Taehyung. I don't want to think about Jungkook now. Especially that his mom knows about my pregnancy.

"He eventually grew tired of looking for me. He's getting married. I saw it in the newspaper. I called him but I am blacklisted to call him. Do you know what happened? They traced my location, he asked his mom to tell me something you cannot swallow and I almost lost my Soobin because she pushed me away. Since then, I closed my door for him. I don't want another trouble." I looked at the empty plate of biscuit. "More biscuits, please."

"I don't trust that woman," Yoongi said as he refills the plate and gives me banana, grapes, and apple. "Mr. Jeon hired an investigator but turned out that the investigator was one of his mom's men. If I were you, you come to his office and talk to him personally."

"I'm not interested in him anymore. I've had enough. And besides, I have cancer. There's no point of going back to him. I will die soon." I said so casually. Yoongi stops from eating his apple and looks at me in dismay.

"You should not make cancer a joke." He said as if he wants to throw the apple he's eating on my face.

Reality sinks in. I felt hopeless again. Why did I say that as if I am not affected? As if I already accepted the truth? I haven't. And I don't know how to accept reality. Perhaps, that's also the reason why I blurted something serious as if it's nothing. Because I haven't accepted the truth yet.

I take out the document from my pocket and slide it to him. He opens it and his eyes widen when he read the diagnosis. His eyes stay on me for a while.

"Yes, Yoongi. I have it. Just like eomma. And I'm pregnant." I wipe the tears that fall on my cheeks.

Yoongi pulls a chair and sits next to me. "Jin this is serious. What's your plan? Gosh, Jin, I can't believe this."

"Me too." My words came out as a whisper. "The doctor wanted me to deliver the baby now. But I refused. Three weeks more and I'm on my 34th week. She said cancer won't affect the baby. I'm fine with that."

"Jin, it's not fine! How can you say it's fine? Have you said it to your appa? You should inform Jungkook about his son. He deserves to know. Where do you live now?"

"I'm with my boyfriend."

"And who is this guy?"

"It doesn't matter. Yoongi, I trust that you will keep our meeting a secret. I know that you're not working with Jungkook anymore but please, keep this a secret."

Yoongi did not answer but I trust him. I know he will not betray me.