HEROES ─ fallen warriors series one shots

1| A Large Heart

(takes place during "Hidden")

Alex

It's been four months of movie nights and hand holding, and I'm honestly really confused. God relationships are difficult, why are they so difficult? Up until the now, the closest I've had to a relationship is my fake romance with Madonna.

Movie nights have been almost every night...and for the most part have been just Khari and me alone. Tonight's movie is 'When Harry Met Sally' and it's been going really well.

The thing about Khari, is that he's perfect. Not just in looks, though he does look perfect, it's in how he acts towards me. I didn't think the amount of patience he shows actually existed. The man is literally sitting in my bed with me watching some of the most romantic movies I've ever seen and he stays polite and keeps his hands to himself.

I hate myself for trying to search for something wrong; some sort of proof that this whole 'opening my heart to love' is a bad idea and that I should go back to being cynical about life. But I can't find a damn flaw, it's absolutely driving me nuts.

We're getting towards the part of the movie where Harry confesses his love for Sally at the New Years Eve party, and I can't help but glance over at him as he watches. He genuinely seems invested in every movie Soroya or I show him. Which makes sense featuring we have impeccable taste and he's never seen these movies before. He's currently sitting with his legs and arms crossed, his eyebrows knit in concentration and a faint smile on his mouth, because he knows exactly what's coming up in the movie next.

I really shouldn't stare at him like this, it's really creepy. I feel like a stalker. I remember Bucky would look at my sister like this, and it used to make me want to jab his eyes out with a pencil. Now look at me, I'm no better than him.

Once the movie ends, and Khari looks as happy as can be, I offer to walk him to the train station we just completed. He nods, and with that we make our way out of my room. Once we make it outside of the palace, he and I slow our pace, and I find myself asking him: "Have you ever been in a relationship before?"

He shakes his head. "No, though I have had many opportunities to in the past few years. Men and women alike have made advances at me."

I pause for a moment. "Do you like both? Men and women I mean?"

Another shake of his head. "No, I'm not like you, it's just men," he says, with a matter of fact confidence that reminds me of how ahead of its time Wakanda is. "But I said no to all of them. I see no reason to be with someone if I know they will not be a good match for me...so I've waited." He then trails off.

I slow my pace even more, and I gently grab hold of his hand. His eyes fall down to our hands and then back up to me, standing a foot or two away from me now.

"Why me? I'm a complete mess. I was nothing but an ass to you for the first weeks we knew each other. I'm so messed up and come with so much baggage...so why did you decide I was a good match for you?"

Khari smiles at me, giving me a look like the answer to my question is obvious. "You definitely are a mess...but that's why I like you. You're different from everyone else I've met. You have been hardened by the world, but at the same time, you have such tenderness and love in you. That rough exterior holds a large heart, and I saw that from the moment I met you."

It's then I realize I'm still holding onto his hand, and it sends alarms off in my mind. My brain is telling me to let go, but I don't want to, so I grip his hand tighter instead.

I feel my face grow rather hot and it feels like a cage of birds has been released inside my stomach. This makes my brain tell me to run for the hills and lock myself in my room, but I don't want to. This pure, humble, sweet, handsome man is in front of me telling me why he chose to be with me and goddammit I am not going to let this moment go. No matter how much my defense system wants me to.

Releasing a huff of determination, I release his hand and bring both of my hands to his fur cloak and use it to pull him towards me, planting my lips on his. Khari lets out a noise of surprise, unsure of how to respond. As I bring my hands up from his cloak to cup his face, he relaxes and kisses me back.

This is my first kiss, and I pray to god it isn't painfully obvious. Khari said he's never been in a relationship before, so one would assume he hasn't either. It sure as hell doesn't seem like it though. Either he's had some experience or I can add 'exceptional kisser' to the list of reasons why he has no flaws.

Khari rests his hands on my arms gently, pulling away from me, the large smile I love so much covering his face.

"What's wrong? Did I do it wrong—"

He shakes his head, bringing his hands up to rub my wrists. I feel frozen, my hands still cupping his face. My head feels slightly dizzy and all I can think of is that I just fucked up something so painfully simple.

"I just don't want you to feel like you have to do anything. I don't want you to kiss me or hold my hand because you're worried I'm going to lose interest or change my mind. I just...I just want you to do what you want to do."

I find myself smiling, slightly out of breath. "You mean that?"

He nods. "I'm not going anywhere. The last thing I want is for you to make yourself uncomfortable on my account."

I bring my lips back down to his, trying to show him since words aren't my speciality, that I'm doing this because I want to, not out of fear. Khari seems to get the message, because he rests his hands on my hips and pulls me closer to him. I feel him smiling against my mouth.

I'm the one that pulls back this time, finding it extremely difficult to do so. I look towards where the station is near the lake, and I reluctantly say: "It's getting late...but do you want to have another movie night tomorrow?"

He nods enthusiastically. "What movie?"

"I think it's time I show you Star Wars."

He creases his eyebrows. "Interesting. Are the actual stars fighting one another?"

I can't help but chuckle. "No...it's much better. You'll see tomorrow."

He nods, squeezing my hands before starting to walk the rest of the way himself, but before he gets too far away, he turns back and says: "Goodnight, Alex."

I smile. "Night Khari." I say a little less loud. I watch as he disappears into the warm Wakanda night, still feeling like I'm cascading through the clouds, unlikely to ever come down.