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I guess you could say it’s normal I mean if you say that getting to the point in life where you aren’t even sure whats going on anymore. Everything got really fucked up when I was 10. There inlies the problem of the bloody wrists and thighs. I’m a guy and that doesn’t neccisarily mean I don’t have problems too. Like yeah. Im not like the rest of them, doesn’t mean you have to treat me different.
Just because I say all of this doesn’t give you permission to fucking speculate. I’m just the same of all of them. Well I have more feelings for the most part. All of the others can do something incredibly fucked up and not give a shit.
Like please I understand that people won’t always like you but does that matter? I guess you could say that it’s ok to be different. I have many objections to your argument that you can be yourself and be ok. If people hate you enough then it doesn’t matter then it doesn’t matter if I act like myself or not. That is at the point where I am, and no one cares about me at all. I could take a seat next to anyone and everyone would move. If you are nothing then people notice. I’ve been thinking a lot about dying recently. Instant release from pain and agony just lying in a box for the rest of eternity. Shit happens you know. The life I live in right now is just full of Failure. There is just me, me, me and more me.
Completing myself is all I have ever set out to do and yet I cannot. Thus giving me the urge to die. If I loved anyone then they feel as if I am too attached. If I am too attached, then why do I never attach to anything I remotely love? It is because people never want to reattach to me and that on the inside and outside is killing me to know that I am not loved. All the pain just builds and builds. The inside of me is like a hot bucket of magma. Still on the inside but waiting to erupt. Maybe it is just how I feel on the inside that is burning but I’m not 100% sure. Maybe it is being on the side of life where I think I can’t go passed anyone. Maybe it is just the thoughts that lie in my head spinning around and around again refusing to spill.
I’m just thinking to hard. Maybe.
I guess you could say it’s my problem.
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Send Me A Rainbow (Wattys2015)
Mystery / ThrillerAnthony suffers from depression and he hates what he has done with his life. Anthony finds that the best way out of his own shit hole is to take his own life. when people begin to love him Anthony regrets his choices. Will Anthony be able to have a...
