Kiss Off

Chapter 9

The world above us has faded to black. A part of me fears another storm, but the logical side realizes that it must be the sun bidding us farewell for the evening.

Other than his occasional inquiry about how I'm feeling, Bryson and I have been sitting in almost complete silence for the past half an hour or so. I know he feels bad. His slip of the tongue had been innocent. He probably assumed I'd already heard the rumors, which I have. I just hadn't expected those rumors to have been generated by someone I'd trusted.

Yes, I know how people view me. I know they think I get around and use guys for my own satisfaction, but I honestly never really understood where that idea came from. I couldn't figure out why so many people believed that I was so careless and callous. I'd created the "rejection" challenge on my own. I'd never verbally expressed it to anyone... ever. It had been my way of protecting myself. But somewhere along the way, that plan morphed into something ugly. Rumors of me being a traitor to the female population - of making women appear weak and dependent on men. Lies about me giving myself away to any loser of a guy who would have me. Stories about me being some kind of sex-driven maniac.

I thought I'd created those lies. By not denying the gossip, I'd turned it into a reality for everyone else. Maybe I do have a problem with craving affection from men. Maybe I am a little bit obsessed with this game I created. But I'm not a maniac. No, I never put that label on myself... Cooper did. And right now, I think I hate him for it. I hate that his lies forced me to be someone I never truly was. Because of his threats to stay away from me, I was forced to seek affection from men that I don't think I would have needed if he'd just stayed out of it. Guys don't approach me, so I have to do the approaching.

Maybe if Cooper had kept quiet, I wouldn't have been considered the leper of the school. He made me Hester Prynne and basically branded a big scarlet "A" on my forehead. I feel like my entire life has been a joke. Has Cooper been watching me and laughing behind my back all this time? Did I do something to him in the past—something I'm unaware of—that's caused him to seek revenge?

I'm not upset that he tried to protect me from the lesser individuals within the male population. I'm upset that he built up characteristics about me that were never true.

Why would he do that?

"I say we change the subject."

Bryson's voice tears me away from thoughts of Cooper and I glance in his direction.

"What subject?" I question, letting my mouth quirk upward in humor. "We haven't spoken a word to each other in like, a half an hour."

He laughs, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, but I can practically see you thinking about it."

I chuckle to myself, not even bothering to deny his observation.

"But," he chimes in, "before we do, I'd like to apologize. One: for even bringing it up. I figured you knew about everything. You and Cooper always seemed so close; I just figured it was some kind of agreement between the two of you. Like, you'd asked him to persuade guys to back off." He shrugs, his face twisted in confusion as if he's just now seeing the ridiculousness of such a thing. "Secondly," he pauses, eyes catching mine, "I'm sorry for believing everything he said rather than making an attempt to get to know you like I should have. It makes me feel like I've missed out." He drops his head, giving my eyes access to only his profile. "Honestly, you seem pretty cool and I think I wouldn't liked to have known you better."

My face feels warm as I take in the meaning of his words, my focus dropping to my lap as I fight the smile threatening to break out across my face.

"Thank you," I mutter, biting at my bottom lip. "I've always known you were pretty cool, so I'm glad we're on the same page now."

He laughs, clutching his chest when the dust issues another fit of coughing.