Haikyuu Scenarios

Weird Conversations I've Had (with extra characters)

Oikawa
"I can fix that"
"I'm calling a professional"
"I'm a professional"
"A more professional professional"

Hinata
"You-you're crushing my spleen!"
"You don't even know where your spleen is"

Kenma
"What the hell kind of noise was that?"
"I sneezed"
"That was NOT a sneeze"

Kuroo
"Do we need wine?"
"No, I need wine. You need to put your pants back on"
"But life is so freeing without them"
"Pants. On. Now."

Also kuroo

"You're speeding!"
"I acknowledged the sign's recommendation"
"Your going 30 miles over!!"

Akaashi
"Well this is a nice change of scenery"
"It's a prison cell"
"I was being sarcastic"

Bokuto
"I am so with you on this-"
"No, you're not"
"I just said 'I'm with you on this'"
"You and me are on COMPLETELY different pages."
"That doesn't matter as long as we are together"
"Ya but you are not with me. Big differences."
"I don't get you."
"Exactly!!!"

Iwaizumi
"Ok what did I do?"
"What do you mean"
"You look like you want to rip my face off"
"Sorry, that's just how my face works"

Kageyama
"Why is he bleeding?"
"Because he's an idiot"
"I didn't know that idiocy caused people to just start spontaneously bleeding from the nose"
"I think it's a new phenomenon"

Tsukishima
"Smiles are contagious"
"Don't worry, I'm vaccinated"

Also tsukki

"What happened to me last night?"
"You thought you developed magical powers and could talk to rocks."
"Kind of glad I don't remember any of that"
"It's okay, I got it all on video"

Nishinoya
"Can I just...undo that?"
"Nope"
"Oh man, because that was embarrassing"
"Yep"

Yaku
"Act natural"
"For this kind of situation, the most natural thing would be to panic, so technically, I panic"
"NO! That's not what I meant! Act like it's a normal day."
"My 'normal' days of late consist of a lot of panic."
"Will you just cooperate?"
"When a person is panicking, they are not apt to cooperate very well."

Tendou
"Are you mad? You look mad"
"I'm not mad"
"Your face is screwed up like you're mad."
"I'm perturbed, not mad."
A few moments of silence
"You still look mad."
"I'm NOT mad! But I will be soon!"

Suga
"Take my hand"
"No!"
"Look, I'm not trying to ask you to marry me, I'm trying to save your life!"