Sensibility

Chapter 5

Zayn Malik, who does he think he is with his blank emotions and towering presence? Even the way he says my name is irritating, Nicole. It's Nikki, dammit! Again, I'm caught in the whirlwind that is emotion when he's around me. It's frustrating, but so exciting. If I'm going to survive my last week here, I need to keep my distance. He's a distraction, nothing more, and my moment of weakness before him was insignificant.

True to Zayn's warnings, I sniffle and cough my way through most of the week. My head feels cloudy and tight as I keep medicated and drowsy. Our small apartment starts to become boxes and labels, as Tori directs our impending move. She's glowing with anticipation, and hardly takes a breath from her constant stream of plans for when we make it to D.C. She has found a small and affordable apartment for us, and won't stop about her grand strategy to storm politicians.

I smile and listen intently still wrestling with my own dilemma. Saturday night, I was sure my future was in New York City. By Sunday morning, my path led straight to D.C. and Dr. Jones' company. But, then there is New York City, and whether I admit it out loud or not, I know I will always be pulled there for answers. Either way, I need to tell Tori.

......

On Friday, movers arrive to ship most of our belongings to D.C leaving our apartment looking bleak and unwelcoming. All that is left are essential clothing, a few kitchen tools we have chosen to donate, and Tori and I. We sit on the living room floor with a pizza in between us and a bottle of wine half gone. Tori laughs, cries, and we fill our minds and bellies with the remaining moments we have in the place we called home the last four years. Tomorrow, we will be boarding a plane to a new state.

"Are you nervous?" Tori asks sipping her wine from a plastic cup.

"No," I answer truthfully. I had spent the majority of my life being nervous; nervous that others would find me odd, nervous that my difference would crumble me into nothingness; nervous that the truth was I was never wanted by my parents. But, right now I wasn't nervous. I was calculating the right time to bring up Dr. Jones to Tori.

"I am," she laughs answering her own question. "I know this is what I've always wanted, but it was always some obscure moment in the future," she says waving her plastic cup of wine in the air. "And now it's here and now. What if I can't do it?" Her aura fades before me.

Finding the right words in the bottom of my plastic cup, I shake my head at this kind girl. "Of course you can," I reassure. "In fact, you are going to do so much more than you ever dreamed. Those bastards don't stand a chance."

Tori blushes her usual purple haze and I refill my cup. "There's something I have to tell you," I begin taking another drink of the sweetness in my cup.

Tori gives me her eyes, letting me know to continue.

"There was a man that came to see me on campus on Sunday," I begin. "His name was Dr. Ken Jones and he owns a company in D.C."

"Really?" Tori smiles a brilliantly sincere smile. "What did he want?"

"To employ me, I think." I can't help but return her glowing face. "He was really interested in my thesis research on nutrition and behavior, and he said he'd love to talk to me when we get to D.C."

Tori gulps down her drink, throwing dancing waves my way. "That's great! What would you be doing? What's the company called? Is it salary?"

I smile and slowly fill her in on what I know. After I finish, Tori squeals and leaps into me. She wraps me up in the most suffocating hug of my life, and the kaleidoscope of emotions from her body on mine is almost thrilling. "Oh my god, Nik! This is too perfect," her voice exclaims in my arms. She pulls back and holds me in place with a hand clamped around each of my arms. "Look at us all successful and shit."