Sensibility

Chapter 11

At 6am, I abandon my reading and decide to take a shower. The warm water settles my shaky nerves, and I let myself relax from the unknown tension I was holding in. My mind drifts to Zayn, and the sudden fearfulness I felt last night at the mere suggestion that he wanted to spend the night with me. Had I gone through with it, would I feel any different today? Would I still be anxious and upset that this man was controlling my every emotion?

I turn off the scalding water and grab a towel to wrap around myself. I'm feeling heated and comforted from the refreshing scent of body wash and shampoo. I wipe away the condensation from the mirror and stare at my wilted self. The truth is, the feelings Zayn gives me are overriding every reservation I've had about men. I never thought I would be able to kiss another man, let alone have this yearning to be even closer. Maybe I was letting my mind control too much of what is natural. Maybe, I should do something I've never done - be honest.

I want this man, more than I've wanted anything in a long time. I won't let my instinctive nature turn me around and run. Who knows? Maybe he'll be totally unfazed when I tell him how I can feel others. Maybe he'll embrace my weirdness with open arms. Maybe I'm having this inner battle for absolutely nothing.

My subconscious straightens out her cobweb hair and gives me her best 'go get 'em' stare. I let a small smile fall on my lips. I brush out my hair, leaving it hang on my shoulders to dry. Then, I pull on jean shorts, and a yellow tank top hoping the jubilant color will sink right through me. After applying a small amount of cover-up I reach for the bathroom door. As soon as it opens, a mess of black hair races past me towards the toilet. Tori gives a groan as her stomach empties into the bowl.

"Oh, Tori," I sink feeling her sickness seep through her and over to me.

"I'm fine," she gags catching her breath. Her convulsing body settles and she sits back to rest against the wall.

I wet a washcloth and press it on her head. "I'll go get you something," I say watching the raven haired girl force a smile at my words. "I'll be right back," I reassure her and leave her clinging to the toilet once more.

.....

Fortunately, a small market is right down the block. I buy Tori water, medicine, and some crackers to settle her stomach. Then, I buy three coffees hoping to catch Zayn when I get back.

Tori is soaking in the bath when I return, and her aura has already lightened a little. I give her the water, medicine, coffee, and crackers and let her know I'll be right outside if she needs me. She thanks me with sincerity that I can feel.

I grab the two other coffees and exit the motel room. The short walk over to Zayn's door isn't enough time to think or re-evaluate exactly what I'm going to say. Instead, I give a gentle rap on the door and wait to see his stunning face again.

My stomach turns when he doesn't answer right away, and I feel my body trying to turn away. Just as I'm in a moment of gaining control of my limbs, the door opens. Zayn stands before me with groggy eyes and wet hair. I push down my uncontrollable subconscious who is yearning to rub her hands through the enticing locks once again. His plain black shirt is clinging to his still wet body, and my heart jumps.

"Hey," he says and his voice is raspy and oh so sexy.

"Morning," I try to smile. "Coffee?"

He accepts the cup with a smile and stands aside. I assume this is an invitation in, and I enter the room. It's messy with blankets and clothes around the floor, but it smells just like him, and I feel as if I'm entering some exotic land full of possibility.

I slowly shut the door, and Zayn turns to me with his wondering gaze.

"So Tori isn't doing too well," I say bringing my own coffee cup to my lips.