Bonded

Chapter Five

I dreamt that I was the black haired, blue-eyed boy, on a cruise across the Atlantic with my family. I was not having much fun, but I enjoyed seeing other people's happiness. That was one thing I didn't have much of these days, and it was comforting to know others could still feel it.

Everything was going just fine, parents sunbathing, splashing in the on deck pool, young kids shouting happily as whales breached the surface of the deep blue water. That is, until somehow the ship sprung a leak, a heavy one. No matter what we did, the boat continued to sink. The captain lost control of the steering, just as a storm started brewing....

There was screaming as we shot over waves and tipped terribly, hours after our last call for help. It seemed like nobody would ever rescue us. Soon, the ship went down.

I was trapped under something, and I couldn't breathe, the breath knocked right out of me. Soon, I was beneath the water, and I could not stop myself from trying to gain oxygen. I inhaled gulp after gulp of water, unable to stop even as I choked. As I filled my lungs with water, a sense of longing took over me. I wanted just to be home with my family, and I hoped that they would survive the wreck. My vision started to fade, and I felt my heart stop.

My eyes flew open. I could breathe again, and the burning in my lungs was gone. But something was very, very wrong. I could see my body beneath me, slowly sinking with the wreckage of the ship. I... I was dead.

I woke up in a cold sweat.

My head still ached a bit, but the dizziness had gone away. On the other hand, I was panicking, and breathing fast. I suddenly started choking and held my throat, willing something to either come up or let air in, and after a moment, I coughed up a cloud of black dust, which settled on my teddy bear, Fred. I was struck dumb when Fred started to move on his own, swinging his arms, head, and legs, moving himself into a defensive position. And I did the most stupid thing I could have done. I moved towards him.

He automatically lunged away from my outstretched hand, and ungracefully landed on his fluffy face. I picked him up and brought him to my bed, sitting across from him so I could face him. Two adorable mismatched buttons looked back at me, and memories from a childhood of cuddling this very teddy bear during stormy nights flashed through my mind- memories of when I still believed in ghost stories.

What am I doing? I thought. It's a teddy bear for goodness sake! Yet somewhere inside, I knew this wasn't true.

To my surprise, Fred's stitched mouth started to move.

"Please," it croaked, "Don't hurt me!"

"What are you?" I asked.

Fred looked straight at me, and I noticed his eyes looked alive, different than those I saw only a few seconds ago; silvery blue had replaced the dead black of a stuffed animal.

"My name is Seth." I sat back against the wall, slowly starting to comprehend what had been happening to me lately. That explained the scratching, the shadow, the dust, the headache, and the dreams. It had been Seth. But that could only mean one thing...

"...Seth? Are you... a ghost?"

Seth nodded. "I haven't dreamed in so long. It was terrible seeing myself down there in the water. I... I hurt," my teddy bear curled up on itself, and touched its chest, "in here. I still do. I didn't know ghosts could hurt, you know, physically....."

For some reason, I was overcome with a wave of emotions. I felt sadness, fear, hopelessness, confusion, and loss. I realized that, just like in my dreams, I was picking up these feelings from Seth.

"...Why are you here then? Can't you just wander around wherever you want if you're a ghost? Haunt people? Oh, shit.... Are you haunting me?"

"No, Diana, I swear it's not like that. I can't wander, because I'm stuck to you somehow."

What? Plus, how did he know my name?

"I've spent a lot of time with you," my teddy continued, as if reading my mind. "I know lots of stuff about you."

My cheeks flushed. "Hey! That's fucking creepy; some of that stuff is private!"

Seth flinched, and I automatically felt bad about lashing out like that. "Seth, what do you mean about being...stuck to me? To be honest, that's really, really weird."

I felt intense frustration radiate from him as he continued. "No matter what I do, I can't leave your side. I physically have to be near you all day, all night, even when you sleep, it hurts trying to leave. But.... I hadn't ever made contact, until yesterday. And through the dreams." My mind was having trouble processing all of this information. He mumbled softly, "Though I couldn't really control the second one...."

"Wait, you made contact? Like...Possession?" So that's what happened at the mall...

Seth, through my teddy bear, nodded. "It was strange.... I felt all of your feelings. I could hear your thoughts. I bet I could have controlled you like I'm controlling your teddy bear right now. I didn't try though, because I didn't want to scare you too much. I screwed up though; I can tell that you're scared. It's weird for me too, Diana."

I laughed darkly. He had scared me. A lot. But I wasn't about to admit it. For some reason, I didn't want to hurt him more, physically or emotionally. If my dream was true, he had been through way more than a kid was supposed to. Kid... another thought passed through my mind."Hey Seth?"

"Yeah?"

"How old were you?"

"When I died? Twelve."

I was surprised. All the twelve year olds I knew were so... hormonal. Well, that was really just from my experience, which only included Johnny.

"I'm so emotional because.... well.... I don't know. Maybe it's because I'm inside a teddy bear. Maybe if I were in a rock, I'd have a stony personality." Again, it seemed as if he could read my thoughts. I couldn't help but smile a bit at the stupid pun, despite the odd situation.

He continued. "Over the years, I lost all of my feelings. I was... well.... like a ghost. I felt empty when I saw the real world and it could not see me back. But then I met you and," he shrugged it off as if it was nothing, but I could see it bothered him greatly; "feelings, they all came rushing back. I was immediately attracted to you." Seth paused, and something about Fred's face softened. "Not the romantic type... more like a physical pull. I soon found out that I couldn't be far from you; I had to be near you, all day, all night, even when you were sleeping."

"Why?"

"I think something bound my spirit to yours....I don't know how, or why. Anyways, I guess you noticed me hanging around, for the last few days it's been pretty obvious... I'm sorry I ruined your bed, it's just nice to be able to touch things again..."

He trailed off and I smiled. Then, to my surprise and his, I picked up Fred and hugged him. To my delight, the teddy and ghost inside of it hugged me back.

"Seth, it's alright. We'll find a way to deal with this."

He hugged me tighter, and I could tell this was the start of a good... if not weird and complicated.... friendship.