The Way he loves me - (BOOK 4)

Chapter 9 - Avoiding me?

Amanda James

I skipped school yesterday, still not in the mood to go to school after what happened at Saturday night. Since my dad came back into our life asking my mom to have me back, it kinda ruins our mood. Ever since that night mom and I don't want to talk about what happened, I missed my dad but the way he left still hurts us.

I'm 18 and still wondering why he left but too weak to ask him why. I want to hate him, but seeing him again make me can't. I have not so many memories about him, the biggest memory I have about him is actually when he left. When I was a kid, I thought he only left for work.

My mom never told me to dislike him, but I know there's a big scar in her because he left us without a word. My mom may know that he married another woman after he left us, but she had never tell me.

What happened in my family is a shame, I've been covering it up my whole life and the fact that Evan was there seeing what happened with his own eyes makes me feel more ashamed. I wish he forgot and I wish he'll never talk to me, I wish he'll keep by himself.

"Amanda," Audrey said after I put some books inside of my locker.

"Hey," I said.

"Where have you been? You didn't even reply to my text?" She asked me.

"Oh my phone broke," I lied.

"Is your phone okay now?" She asked.

"Yeah I fixed it yesterday that's why I didn't come to school," I said.

"Ooh, glad you're okay," she smiles, I'm sorry Audrey but I'm not in the mood to tell you about what happened to me.

"Evan is looking for you, aren't your group project is done?" She asked then it surprised me that Evan is actually looking for me.

"Yeah he left couple of things in my house, maybe he wants to take it," I lied again.

"Ooh, okay," Audrey simply nodded.

"Anyway, Ethan and I are going out after school wanna come?" She asked.

"I'm alright, you two have fun I'll take a bus," I said then she only smiles.

"Okay see you at lunch," she smiles then left.

I watch her leave then locked my locker, I hate to lie to Audrey. I always tell her everything but sorry, today I had to lie. I hate to talk about my family problem. It's just so complicated, messy and obviously not beautiful.

I was about to get to my class until I see Evan is walking down the hall, I find his eyes are looking at me but I look away. I make my way into the classroom without a second thought. Please don't chase me, I don't want him to ask me about anything.

If I have one wish it would me him disappearing when that problem happened. I don't want anybody to see me like that, I'm too weak and ashamed for that. I always play safe and now I feel not safe enough.

~

Thank god school is finally over, I'm too scared of Evan asking me what happened. I hope he forgot about it and move on, although exam is coming and I need to be focus on it.

I'm walking out of the class while staring at the floor, this day seem heavier than yesterday. I know my mom will come home then lock herself inside her room, and probably she'll cry. I hate to be in this situation, it feels like both of my mom and I are broke but we don't really communicate with one another, I'm actually really scared to stand by my own.

I see the bus is waiting at the bus stop and there's my destination. I can't drive and it's not a problem for me to take a public transportation.

"Amanda James," someone hold my arm and stop me from walking, I know it's Evan's voice.