The Gospel of the Font

Chapter 3

"You're... a... what?!"

"Do not be afraid," Allustar says as he takes a step towards me.

"I'm not afraid!" I shout. "I'm pissed off! This is a private room, asshole!" This douche-bag must be finally realizing the level of my anger because he's starting to back off a bit.

"Faith, please," he says, keeping his soft and gentle tone. This guy sounds like a high school guidance counselor or something. "I have been sent here with an urgent message from the Lord for you."

I shake my head and laugh. My mind is still spinning around the question of how this weirdo got up here in the first place, but I'll move on to the content of his message for now. "Sent from God? What do you take me for?"

"Faith, I..."

"Look, just leave your copy of The Watchtower, or whatever, on the bed and get the fuck out of my room!"

"You misunderstand," Allustar says. "I am a servant of the Lord. I have come to save you." Allustar extends his arms out to his sides in that kind of 'I want to give you a hug' way. "It is His will that you be rescued."

I roll my eyes. This guy is beyond pissing me off now. I'm ready to throw his ass off the terrace. "What do you mean by 'save' anyway?" I ask. It's obvious he's not going to leave so I might as well find out what's so important. "What do I need to be rescued from?"

Allustar slowly lowers his left arm as his right extends out towards me. He extends his index finger and points it at my chest. "That."

I look down as I remember that I'm still clutching this strange book. Wait, is that what he's pointing at? That means that... "You can see it?!" I shout. I'm now slightly less aggravated with my intruder. He may be an intruder, and possibly a peeping tom, but he's the only person I've come across so far that can see this damn thing. Maybe he can help me figure out what it is.

Allustar nods. "I can," he says. His voice is slightly louder now but still kind. He knows he's found his in so he must no longer feel the need to play the gentle stranger. "I can not only see the Book, but I know the terrible curse it will place upon you if you don't let me help you."

"What do you mean?" I ask as I pull the Book away from my chest. I look down at it. The street lights make the symbols covering it just barely visible. "What is this thing anyway?"

"It is a text we had hoped would stay locked away forever," Allustar replies. "It contains the message of the Adversary."

"The Adversary?" I question. I should probably still be mad about this guy being on my private terrace, but I'm too inquisitive to care anymore. "What are you talking about?"

Allustar sighs. "I'm referring to the Prince of Darkness himself, the Father of all Lies."

Okay, these are terms I've heard before. They make my stomach turn a bit because they are terms that Molly repeats over and over to me when she's babbling on about me getting saved or some shit. I don't need Allustar to make his next statement, but he does anyway.

"The Book you hold contains the words of Lucifer himself," Allustar says with bold surety.

Now I know this guy's officially off his rocker. I can't help but let out a laugh. Not only is it a ridiculous statement, but he said it so proudly and with such force. "So, you're saying this is some kind of devil bible?" I ask, unable to wipe the smile from my face.

Allustar's blank expression does not change. Apparently, he doesn't find this as funny as I do. He really needs to loosen up. "You could look at it that way, yes."