Warning : Cutting and Depression, please skip if you are uncomfortable with these things
You sighed as you sat down on your bed in your dorm room, rolling up your sleeves of your shirt slightly to reveal your bandaged arms from the previous night before. All you could think about was the call you had gotten from your dad. You honestly thought he had changed since you left but evidently you were so wrong.
"Mistake"
"you'll never be a hero no matter what"
"You're a disappointment you know that?"
"This is why your mother left, you only have me and then you're alone"
"No one would care about you, you fucking whore"
Tears rolled down your cheeks as you stared down at them, noticing that your hands started to shake in fear. The tears started to fall on top of your bed sheets as you blanked out. Not even realizing that you pulled out a razor from your bed side table that you kept there just in case you couldn't make it to the bathroom. You held the small sharp blade close to your skin on your wrists. You couldn't stop shaking as your breath hitched to keep it steady.
"Such a disappointment" You muttered, one cut then two in neat rows. You felt as though this was making this way worse. Your anxiety was reaching it's point at the moment and you couldn't stop it at all. Your tears clouded your vision slightly as you continued to cut at the old scars on your arms. Not even caring if someone walked in, might as well find you dead. You just couldn't do anything right, as soon as the sports festival was over your dad called and started to yell at you for not making it to the finals. Of course your friend Midoriya overheard your conversation with him on the phone but nothing could stop your dad from constantly calling. To remind you of what you truly are.
As you sobbed quietly on your bed, you heard someone knock on your door. You quickly hid the razor back in the cabinet and ran in to the bathroom to try and clean up everything that you had done. No one needs to know, no one should worry about you.
"Y/n? It's Midoriya, could I come inside?" He asked, obeying your privacy since he hasn't came in yet. You didn't know what to do at all, your mind was drawing a blank. Your eyes were swelled and red not to mention the tear stains on your cheeks. You had blood going down your arms and fresh cuts that needed to be covered up as soon as possible. Now was defiantly not a good time for sure.
"ah Midoriya c-could you come by l-later....I just n-need some time *wince* Alone right now" You were holding back tears as you felt the soap enter your wound. You bit down on your bottom lip to hold in the scream you wanted to unleash. But you didn't hear any footsteps going away from your door after you replied to him.
"Y/n is there something wrong?" He asked with a concerned tone to his voice as he spoke. You quickly fiddled with the medical box under neath your sink and started to unravel the bandages to cover your arms. Every time you wrapped your arm you winced and groaned in out right pain. Why did you do this to yourself? But evidently he got the message that there was something going on because you didn't answer. You heard the door knob unlock from outside the bathroom door. All you wanted to do was cry, he couldn't see you like this. You were disgusting and unkept. Your hair was a mess and you all around looked like you just had gotten out of bed.
"Y/n are you in there?" He asked softly yet sternly like he wasn't trying to scare you. You didn't know what to say to him, what would he think of you if he saw this mess. You needed to hurry and finish the last wrap around your other before he came in to the bathroom.
"Deku I'm f-fine don't worry about me okay" You managed to reply as you finished your other wrap on your arm. Accidentally kicking something in the process since you were trying to put everything away. That was your mistake, you knew as soon as he heard that noise you were basically done for. Just like you expected the door knob turned and the door came open and there he was. A confused slash concerned look on his face as he looking around the room at everything that was brought out and the bloody bandages and tissues on the counter. Not to mention you forgot to pull down the sleeves on your shirt so he saw your arms.
"Don't worry about you my butt, oh my god Y/n why would you do this to yourself" He said as he quickly pulled you in to a hug, not even caring about the blood on your hands. You couldn't help but start to cry once more in to his shoulder as he rubbed your back in circles to try and calm you down.
"How long Y/n" he asked as he noticed your breath started to ease down and the tears quit coming on to his shirt. You didn't answer him which made his grip tighten around you.
"Y/n....how long" He asked again, he bit his bottom lip and let out a sigh.
"few years maybe.....ever since my mom left me really" Tears started to form again in your eyes.
"This is all because of your dad isn't it, I knew when I over heard him on the phone with you he would cause something like this.....my god why would you believe the stuff he says about you. What has he said to you?!" He asked fanatically, anger rising with in him as he waited for your answer.
"That I'm nothing.....I'm why my mom l-left us....I'll n-never become a hero...." You couldn't continue on, the ones you were thinking of were just to harsh and rough. You couldn't bare the thought of him insulting you, you just wanted to disappear from everyone and everything.
"oh Y/n....none of those things are true....You are the most prettiest girl I have ever met, your smile is so pretty not to mention you E/c eyes. You're one of the most tough people I know when we fight and train and I envy you for your determination in saving others and most importantly defeating the bad guy. None of what you sad excuse of a father said to you is real....You are important to me and to everyone here in 1A......I don't want to lose you okay....you mean the world to me you truly do" He told you as he cupped your cheeks and wiped away your tears that fell from your now red eyes. You didn't want to believe what he told you, everything told you that it was wrong but it some how felt right, like he was telling the truth to you.
You hugged him even tighter then before and felt his arms wrap around your waist again. Picking you up as best he could.
"Please promise me you won't hurt your self again okay....I don't want you getting hurt and beat yourself up over silly things your dad lies about" He said as he waited for your response. It would take you a while to get over your habit, but with his help you actually felt like you could change for the better and stop. You knew he would help you through this not matter what and you had to thank him for that.
"I promise I will change for you"
"Not for me Y/n, for yourself" You chuckled softly at him and rested your head against his.
"Yeah....for myself....and for the better"
