alive /drh/

it sucks

a̶̳̺͇̗̪̣̜̗̔͒̑̀l̵͉̯̺͖̖̟̝̘͈̭̾̈́̊̌i̷̢̛̬̬̘̪̘͔̣͇̾v̶̨̱̥̠̠̩̭̠̭͌ͅe̴̞͚̔͌̇

i woke up on saturday with a slight headache, reumy eyes, literal haystack on my head, dry mouth and a couple of blackouts.

moaning in anguish was the first thing i did in the morning, along with some long seconds lying on my back and watching the ceiling and the golden sunbeams on it.

i quickly riffled my memories over about the party the other night. some sentences, actions or images appeared, and i took my time analyzing them. anything to avoid getting up from my bed.

at the end, i had to do it.

i yawned, and i finally got myself to push the blanket off of my body. i tried not to think of the chilly air on my skin instead of the warm one underneath the blanket, so i saved myself an actual assault of swear.

i got up and stood still, just in case i might fall or something. i didn't want to risk it.

i yawned one more time, and felt my eyes watering up. i wiped the tears away before i stretched my whole body and groaned pleased. it was definitely so much better then.

after a few seconds, i found myself thinking of "the-bellie-action" and in that very moment, like a barrier torned, everything just spreaded into my mind.

well, then, standing at the middle of my room, after waking up from a party night, it seemed like everything that i remembered.

they kissed.

yes, that's right. truth or dare.

my heard dropped.

i felt like i just aquired the situation, while, in fact, i was lowkey all upset after they did it. me and lettie didn't speak to each other. again. i tell you, emotial rollercoaster.

i was staring at the mirror on the wardrobe of mine on my left and was wondering about the things after. random sentences, actions, tiny things were swirling in my brain like some sort of montage.

when i felt myself slightly shivering, i ducked my head and quickly stepped to my wardrobe and opened its door.

i grabbed my time-tested black football trousers which were breathing forth perfume in the scent of our rinsing that my family used. i had always used them at trainings along with my light green tee.

i was going to have the training beginning from one pm, but i preferred to put it on then so i didn't have to change that much. and it was about eleven, according to my size up.

as soon as i realized it, i turned around to look for my mobile, and just after that i realized i had no clue where i had putten it, nor when i used it last.

i murmured 'fuck' a few times as i went back to my open wardrobe, and after a little while, when i discovered i couldn't find my football merch, i turned around again and snortingly went up to door, opening it.

it was very bright. so fucking bright.

i felt some more pain in my head besides that i already had, as i yawned and tried not to think of that i was highly cold there.

i heard some music downstairs and as i was walking towards the bathroom, i stopped for a second and listened to it to make sure i really heard music, not a burglar. i didn't know how it was possible to have a burglar broad day with my dad home. doesn't matter actually. woah, am i still talking?

in other cases, i would had shouted 'hiya' to my dad, that's the way i do it, but that morning i felt that was the last thing i fancied to do. so i made my way to the bathroom and slowly closed the door behind me while i was about to recognize the song playing at the ground floor.