𝙳𝚎𝚖𝚞𝚜/𝙳𝚞𝚔𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚒𝚝 𝙾𝚗𝚎 𝚂𝚑𝚘𝚝𝚜 (𝚂𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚜 𝚂𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚜)

What do hugs feel like?

I'm a sucker for angst so... End is a bit rushed but oh well...

Warnings -

Unsympathetic Sides, sympathetic Remus and Deceit, bulling, crying, lonely Remus. (Let me know what I've missed)

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Piping hot tears oozed from beneath his lashes, trickling their way gracefully down and over his cheeks, despite turning his eye shadow into nothing but dirty wet sludge at the tip of his chin. He shouldn't cry. He's not supposed to cry. He wasn't that kind of Side. What would the others think if they found him crying his heart out like this? Would they even care? Would anyone even stop to comfort him? Or would they carry on with whatever they were doing and pretend he wasn't even there? Like he wasn't even meant to exist... like he didn't matter.

Hauling his knees up to his chest, clamping his arms around them as tight as he could, Remus stifled a sob. He dragged a hand over his face to wipe away the mess his eyes created. It wasn't fair! None of it was ever fair! Was he really that bad? Was he really that disgusting that no one wanted anything to do with him?

All he wanted was to know what one felt like... what a hug felt like! Was that so much to ask?! Did he have to scream at the top of his lungs, gouge someone's eyes out, and play with their intestines until they ever offered him one? Because no matter what he'd previously done to try and receive a hug of his own did not have the expected result... 

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At first, he observed... that's all he could do. He watched how a hug was handled between Sides. He took notes. So many notes. Notes in his big book of ideas. He planned. He watched. Remus knew that if he observed long enough, he'd eventually understand how to have one of the best hugs ever! He could act, but everyone knew he wasn't as good as Roman... he could never stay in character long enough. He always got distracted by his grotesque ideas.

So instead... He hid in the shadows. He watched, scribbling down notes.

A comfart   - A comfort hug -

Gently wrap arms around the other person, pulling them carefully to your chest... not squeezing too hard... and don't get hard in other places... Keep it light and fluffy (The hug)... this could occur when someone is crying, upset, or feeling lonely, etc.

Virgil sat, sniffling, on the couch beside Patton, who had stepped in to comfort the crying trait. It appeared that Virgil had become more comfortable showing his emotions and feelings since being with the Light Sides... How he could cry without judgement from others. How he could receive love and comfort without fearing to ask for it. Something Remus often envied.

"Aw, come here, kiddo." Patton shuffled closer to the smaller male, eyes scanning him with a sorrowful gaze. Patton had never looked at Remus like that... ever. Then again, no one had ever been concerned or worried about him, either. Carefully, Patton enveloped his arms around Virgil's tiny body, melting against the others chest with a sigh as his hair got stroked. Soothing. It looked so warm. So soft and cosy. Remus blinked. He could do that! He could give a comfort hug! 

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There were so many other hugs he had learned about!

Bear hug. The Bro hug. The quick 'I don't really want to hug you' hug.

There were so, so many! And more!

And it was his chance to finally give someone a hug! He had practised on his stuffed toys thousands of times; but now he was ready. He was ready to hug a real Side! He was ready for love, comfort and warmth of soft cuddles and snuggles.

But that's not what he got...

"Ew, Remus, get off of me!"

"But I -"

Slap.

"You stink! Go away!"

"I just want -" ​​​​​​​

Shove.

"Don't touch me, FREAK!"

"I'm not a -"

Thwack.

"No one wants a hug from you!"

"What if I -"

Crack.

"Intrusive thoughts, I think it's best if you leave everyone alone."

"But... O-okay..." 

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His room felt as if it had been drained from all warmth. He shivered. Maybe it was for the best. It wasn't as if anyone would want someone as dirty and as crude as him lingering on them. Frightened in case they caught fleas or something. Remus didn't have fleas! He really didn't.

A sob crawled up from his throat, echoing in the emptiness of his room and bouncing from wall to wall. Ceasing when a thump of a knock sounded on his door. It could only be one person. Deceit. Though, it was only once in a blue moon he visited, Remus was still grateful that he did every now and again.

"Remus?"

"D-Dee? What ya need?" Remus tried desperately to keep his voice from trembling, obviously it did not obey.

A yellow, gloved hand pushed down the handle, proceeding to open the bedroom door which belonged to the 'Trash monkey'. "I heard crying... are -" Deceit's snake-like eye shone, flickering gold to adjust to the darkness that engulfed the entire room. Despite that fact, the snake could see the mound in the middle of the bed shaking like a rat about to get eaten.

Deceit paused for a short second, contemplating if he should leave to let Remus grieve in peace, or stay and find out what was going on.

"I'm - I'm fine."

"Lying is my job, Remus." The snake-like trait raised a brow, gliding closer to the others bed and taking a seat on the edge of it. "You're not very good at it, either."

"I j-just..." Remus sniffled, hand shooting up to cover his face. "I just wanted to kn-know what a hug felt like... but I - th-they..." Another set of sobs racked his body, making him appear smaller then he really was.

Deceit nodded, clearing his throat... Gently, he wrapped an arm around the quivering Side's shoulders, pulling him close, and began rubbing his arm. Despite the heaviness in Remus' stomach, it fluttered at the feeling of his body being pressed against Deceit's. He sunk into the warmth of his side, appreciative of the gesture he had waited so long to call his own. A hug. Deceit's touch made the room warmer somehow, safer than it had ever felt before. "I once wondered the same thing..."