Despair [updated] (GxG) (#JULIANTINA)

Chapter Three

Feeling heartbroken is something no one wants to go through at all. It's the worst thing a human being can through emotionally. Either it's because the loss of someone you've loved deeply or just you've got broken up with someone, it's not a good experience.
And as you can guess it, I'm going through one which I'm starting to think that will never go away but I at least have to try and ignore it.

I have to go to work.

It's the beginning of spring and I have to release the new clothing line. It's all about spring fashion for all. It's basically a unisex line where women, men, and all genders can feel comfortable wearing. Without the help of my team I wouldn't have gotten this great idea.

I grab my phone and keys, and headed out.
I breath out, "forget about her."
I keep reminding myself everyday to just forget.
It seems to work but when the day is over, she resurfaces in my thoughts again.
It's a loop.
Everyday I wake up, I seem to not remember but when I turn to my side and don't see her laying besides me, I remember.
But when I arrive to my work place, she's gone from my mind, until I get home.
I've gotten used to it for a while, until I met her.
It's a long story of how I met her but right now I have more important things.
I pull up to the parking lot and sigh, "you can do this, Juliana."

"Juliana! I'm so glad to see you girl!" They hug me, seeing how happy they're to see me.
I smile, a real smile, "be glad I'm not in my bed right now cause I was planning not to come today, but seeing that we have work to do for this spring, it gave me strength."
They as in Ali, gave me a puppy frown, "aw baby, I can't imagine what you are going though right now," they touch my cheek, their thumb caressing it, "just so you know, I'm here. I'm here for you."
I smile, a sad smile, "I know."
Someone comes into my office, "Sorry to interrupt you boss, but they need you in five minutes. The new models are here."
"Thank you, Harvey! Be there in a min."
The new models whom I've seem to forgotten about.
Fuck. Me.

~~

"This seasons lineup is amazing. But we need new models for this. It's a unisex brand and we need different body types," I state to everyone in the room.
This meeting better go well or else...
Ali nods, "I think so too. Seeing all the small waist models in the fashion industry is giving me a stroke. I hate to see the minority be the plus size models than the majority small size models. Why not have both?"
I know that my team will have my back in my decisions. My company is an example to society. We love to appreciate every human being, no matter what they identify as, no matter what size they wear, or what ever race, nationality, etc. they ARE the majority in our eyes.
I look at the men in suits who are now men and women.
They nod their heads, flipping through the papers they have to sign so we could get this clothing lineup out to the public.
I smile as they take out their pens and sign.
"Congratulations," one of them says, "better make a change in society."

The whole day, cheering and laughing as we celebrate this big win.
I received the list of the new models for the lineup and came across with a name.
The smile on my face faded as everything that I wanted to forget came rushing in.
"Carvajal, Valentina."

~~

I'm throughly convinced that my life is going to be miserable for quite a while, only until I die.
Valentina Carvajal will be a more for my new lineup and I'm don't know what to feel.
Is it anger?
Was this intentional?
Fuck!
I mentally yell since my staff can't know my real emotions.
I breath out and accept it.
See you tomorrow, Carvajal.