Getaway Car

comfort

They'd been in Stefan's car for hours, talking about everything but the elephant in the room. Elena looked out the window watching the trees go by, listening to the music that flowed through the car. It was nice how comfortable she felt with Stefan, they could go from talking to peaceful silence in a matter of moments with no awkwardness involved. They both knew each other so well at this point that they could practically read each other's minds. She knew it was sometimes weird for others to be around them whenever they got into one of their flows, it was like walking into a conversation between two people who had no idea anyone else was in the room. To this day when Elena and Stefan were together, everyone else seemed to fade into the background, in many ways she was closer to him than other people she had grown up with. She knew there was no judgment whenever she told him something going on in her life and she felt he had the same with her.

Elena couldn't help but wonder how her life would have been different now if she had stayed with Stefan. She thought she'd be happier in a lot of ways, maybe even be human again. She tried to picture living a human life with Stefan, and it was almost too easy to see. They'd be in college, Stefan would be going to school to be a doctor with Elena, they'd have late nights studying together and would eventually start their own practice together in Mystic Falls. They would have gotten married and started a family, it would have been so normal and simple. The raw reality of what she had missed out on seemed even stronger after Damon had confessed to her parent's death.

Elena also wondered what it would have been like if her parents hadn't died. How would they have handled her datingStefan? She'd like to think at some point they'd had gotten over the fact he was a vampire. Elena couldn't imagine how they would have handled everything that had happened with Klaus, she knew they'd probably have taken Elena away from Mystic Falls, tried their best to keep her out of it. She'd probably had learned how to protect herself from vampires by her dad's hand rather than by Alaric's who hadn't been nearly as well trained as Greyson likely had been. Jeremy would have stayed in town, gone to college, been a normal boy. Maybe that's what made her so angry, the things Jeremy had been robbed of during all this. Sure Jeremy would have probably been trained to protect himself as well but he wouldn't have nearly the reason to hate vampires as he did now.

" Did you realize your phone keeps ringing?" Stefan asked, bringing Elena's thoughts back to reality.

Elena glanced in the backseat where her purse that contained her phone sat, "it's probably Damon," she said frowning at the thought of having to talk to him.

" Is your plan to just ignore him?" Stefan asked, " because in all my years of knowing Damon, ignoring him will just lead Damon to follow us," he said.

Elena knew he was right, that didn't mean she wanted to give Damon the satisfaction of hearing her voice.

"I can text him next time we get gas, let him know you're not dead," Stefan offered.

Elena shook her head, she knew Stefan sending anything about Elena to Damon would make everything so much worse. All Damon's jealousy and insecurity about their relationship compared to Stefan and her's would come out in full force and probably result in someone's death.

" I'll text him, tell him I'm alive and just don't want to talk to him for a while," Elena said knowing that was probably the best option. It seemed to be the one that was fairest to her that resulted in the least amount of damage.

" Do you think you two will be able to fix things this time?" Stefan asked, keeping his eyes on the road.

Elena looked over at Stefan, studying him carefully trying her best to answer the question. " I don't see a way past this, not this time," she said. " But I guess I'll figure it out as I go," Elena said running fingers through her brown locks.

Stefan nodded, " that seems like a fair answer," he said his voice calm.

Elena couldn't help but wonder what he was really thinking. She knew he still loved her, it was obvious in nearly every interaction they had together, from the smiles he saved just for her to the way he would drop everything just because of one phone call.  Elena knew she probably didn't deserve a man like Stefan's love. He was kind, generous, protective in a good way that wasn't overbearing, he made her feel safe even when the world was screaming the opposite to her, and Elena had no idea why he loved her.  After everything that happened didn't she deserve someone like Damon? Someone who would lie to her for years then acted like it was nothing when he finally confessed the truth. Elena knew her faults, she knew she could be selfish and self-centered, she knew stubborn and could forgive people for nearly everything in life.

"It's okay not to be okay with what he did Elena, I have to forgive him for his stupid choices because he's my brother, but you? You don't owe him anything, frankly, I don't know how you've managed to forgive him for the things he's done," Stefan said. " You don't deserve this, you don't deserve to be treated like that, to be lied to like that," he added barely concealing the anger in his voice.

Elena shook her head a little, taking a shaking breath, " Don't I though? After the shit, I've done and excused for him? After all, I put you through?" she asked turning to look at Stefan. Her large doe eyes were like daggers staring at Stefan as he drove.

"After what I put you through that summer Elena I kinda had it coming," Stefan pointed out, "as Caroline would so aptly say, 'karma is a bitch'".

Elena laughed, a real laugh that only Stefan seemed to be able to coax out of her even on her worst days.

" You're going to get through this Elena, it's going to suck and you'll probably have to have some very hard conversations but in the end, you'll be fine," Stefan said as if he had seen the future and knew all this for a fact.

"Thanks," Elena said glancing over at the man next to her. He really was something, Elena couldn't figure out how she'd gotten so lucky to keep him in her life as long as she had.