Mismatched

Chapter 6

As I walked around Bryant Park, I saw Jace sitting on a bench. It was the exact same bench we sat on when he gave me my friendship ring. Blue for unity, white for purity, pink for love, his words replayed in my mind as I looked at the friendship bracelet he gave me last night.

Why am I still wearing it?

I took a deep breath and walked towards him. "Hi, Jace," I said.

"Hi, Belle. Hey, you're wearing the bracelet," he said with a smile as he stood up.

"Yeah, I am," I replied, averting his eyes. I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. This turned out to be more awkward than I thought. I fiddled with the bracelet around my left wrist. Blue for unity, white for purity, pink for love.

Okay, it kind of reminds me of the national flag except it's red, white and blue. Red for hardiness and valour, white for purity and innocence, and blue for vigilance, perseverance and justice. Maybe he got inspiration from that. Pink is a shade of red after all.

Never mind. Ignore me. I'm just panicking.

"Where are we going for lunch?" I asked.

"How does La Masseria sound to you?" he replied with a smirk. I see what you did there. La Masseria was the place we had our second date.

I nodded slowly. "Okay, sure. That sounds good. La Masseria it is, then," I muttered. "I haven't eaten there for a very long time anyway. It's always been Haru Sushi," I laughed. "Okay, let's go."

My heart is palpitating a thousand beats per minute. I have no idea what to do. How the hell am I supposed to tell him that I still like him? That's so embarrassing like, 'hey, you broke my heart into smithereens but— you know what?— I'm still madly in love with you!'

Hell, no.

All of a sudden, I felt his hand brushing against mine. Should I hold it or should I move away? I chose the latter and subtly hid the fact that I did it on purpose by adjusting my hair.

"You're a little uncomfortable, aren't you?" he asked.

I looked up at him in surprise. How did he know?

"You always touch your hair when you're nervous or uncomfortable," he replied with a smile as if he heard my thoughts. "We don't have to meet up again if you don't feel like it, you know? You can just tell me that you don't want to see me again. I don't mind."

"No, it's fine," I muttered with an awkward smile. "Um, I just... It feels so surreal that we're meeting up again. I never thought I would ever see you again. I thought our fate only lasted until the end of high school and our paths would never cross again."

He nodded. "I never thought I would see you again too," he said.

I looked up at him. I wanted to say something but I didn't know what. I missed you so much. Every day, I wondered why you left me without a word. Was it something I did? Did you fall for someone else? Am I not good enough?

I hated you so much. I hated your selfishness. I hated that I kept thinking of you.

Did you know? When I found out that I got matched with you, I was secretly happy. But, once I thought about how you left me, all that happiness left. I hated the app. I hated the fact that I had tapped on your heart. I hated myself for tapping on your heart.

I turned away and cleared my throat. I'm sorry. I can't do this anymore. Let's break up, his last message replayed in my mind. He didn't even have the guts to tell me in my face that he wanted our relationship to end.