A Dream of a Long Winter

1: 'A candle lights others and consumes itself'

It broke my heart to leave that child, it truly did. She wailed and screamed, kicking her little legs and clinging to my arm, crying 'sister, sister.' When I returned her to the village she was born in, I made sure to change her eyes to disguise their unnatural bearing. As I retreated, the girl only stood there staring into the darkness and weeping with such sorrow.

How could she ever understand?

Her mother, Daji, was a beautiful fox spirit that I loved like a sister. We grew up together in the fox clan's home of Mount Kunlan before it was decimated. I still remember the first snowfall we had ever seen where the plum blossoms were fragrant, and the laughter of the young ones vibrant. She was the most promising of all of us, and the clan master took extra care of her. Together we embarked on a journey into the night hand in hand, running through the forest where none could hear our secrets and dreams.

We ran on the mountain trail for hours until we reached a little tavern in a small human village, still full of life even on that cold winter day. While we sat amidst the voices of the mortals, and drank wine until our bellies could hold no more, we realized the parts of life we missed out. Those humans... they seemed so alive. There was no other word I could use to describe it. And we, the naive fox spirits of the mountain, were entranced.

When the fox clan took human form, they were beautiful beyond compare. The only reason was to win the hearts of mortal men and steal their essence for power. Of course, there were other ways like taking from the essence of nature, but those were not as appealing and took far too much time to accomplish. So our master taught both ways, but the young practiced seduction much more. We loved the eyes of men lingering a bit too long, and sought mischief before the boring path of cultivation.

That was why we frequented this human village more than we should have, and played to our hearts' content with the mortals we could ensnare. In truth, perhaps we also loved their movements, their emotions... so different than those of home.

I remember the one fateful night where Daji was ripped from my hands. The one night that seemed to set everything else into action. We were drinking wine, as the habit of drinking after catching a night's prey had developed, in a human village far from home. It was customary for foxes to leave the den to gain more spiritual power, but we had done so as a pair. The night was young, and the atmosphere was joyous for we both were turning three hundred soon. Our power was growing, while she had grown a second tail, I had grown three! It was truly a time to celebrate, and we were so intoxicated that we hadn't noticed a young man entering with his friend.

"Huxian, cheers!" she shouted, her loud voice attracting many eyes. Mortal females in this era were not supposed to be loud and uncouth, so I quickly quieted her down.

"Daji, Daji," I crooned, though still drunk out of my mind. "Quiet down. Do you see how loud you're being?"

"Ah to hell with manners!" she cried heroically. "Let's drink the night away in celebration! Who would have thought we'd come this far!"

I could only sigh in resignation, and throw back my own jug of wine. Once Daji began, she would only be finished when the night was over.

"There we go sister!" she cried, wine spilling from the corner of her lip. "You need to let loose more! After all, what is life without some fun?"

She lifted her glass and thrust it against mine, laughing heartily at her own words. I smiled. Immortality could be seen as a blessing, and us foxes were still at the beginning of our never-ending lives. Daji told me time and time again, if she was never to die then she wanted everyday to be full of happiness. Even if her happiness was as simple as chugging down a strong drink.