A Dream of a Long Winter

7: 'An aggrieved army is sure to win battles'

The god Erlang told me I was able to speak to master because of somebody called the Duke of Zhou. The dream was too powerful, so my body had collapsed as soon as it was given. 

"So, what should I make of this then?" I asked him in a desperate attempt to gain more information. "Why would this god of dreams allow me to speak with my master?"

Erlang shrugged as if it was a matter out of his grasp. "How would I know? The Duke of Zhou is a grumpy old immortal who spends most of his time asleep. None of the gods bother with him."

I shut my eyes, praying that perhaps the god would bless me once again with a way to converse with master. The looming questions ate away at me and caused a restless stir in my body. How could I sit still in such a time? My clan was gone, Daji was gone... but master was alive! Even with the words he had spoken, I couldn't just lie down and wait for fortune to come my way.

I had two matters that needed answers. Who or what caused the destruction of the fox clan? Where was master? I opened my eyes to see the mysterious god in front of me, observing my every move. It was as if he could see all my thoughts...

I shivered under his perspicacious gaze, and wondered... just how much did Erlang know? I had an ominous feeling lurking in the pit of my stomach. There was information being withheld from me, I could say that without a doubt. But how would I force him to speak?

Erlang's lips curved into a playful grin as he leaned closer. "You seem to be thinking about something. Tell me what's on your mind."

I moved back with a scowl, and tried to rise from the ground in vain. My body was still weak, so all I could do was lay back onto the cool ground. What could I say to a god? The gods and the spirits were like oil and water. They could never coexist on this land in both sides' eyes. We spirits never had a chance to prove ourselves to them; they had flicked us aside as an atrocity just because we held power greater than the mortals. The spirits barely attempted to go against the will of the heavens, and even when they had, they were struck down without a chance. 

We were not their enemies. Their only contention was themselves. 

"Hmph," I snorted in disdain. "Why so concerned with my affairs? I'm just a fox spirit who's lost her people."

Saying the words aloud made reality weigh deep on my soul. A bitter, pungent taste spread across my tongue as they left my mouth, and my tears that had dried emerged once more. I wiped them away quickly, but they did not escape the god's keen eyes.

He sighed and rested his chin in his hand. "I'll stay here until you can move again," was his only response to my biting words. "Once you've recovered, I'm heading to Southern Qi to look into the snake clan."

The snake clan? A sudden burst of hope flashed through my mind, as I considered the possibility more. The three strongest clans had a deep rooted hatred for one another since long ago. If anyone would know of something, it would be the snakes or the tigers. Master spoke of their leaders, two powerful spirits that survived the perilous course of time itself. With their supposed might, I wouldn't be surprised if they played a hand in such a crime. 

I had to grasp any opportunity as it came, so for the sake of my clan, I swallowed my pride and begged. 

"Please," I pleaded softly to the god. "Allow me to accompany you there. I must meet with the leader of the clan."

Erlang regarded me with a hint of disgust, yet a loose smile played on his lips. "You're acting odd," he said slowly. "If you want to come, you don't have to act like that."

I ignored his attempt to incite my anger, and watched him with anticipation. "So, I can come with you?" 

The god shrugged, patting Xiao Tian's head as it bounded back to his side from finishing its meal. "I don't see why not. I'm heading there anyway and the journey is pretty far. It'll be nice to have some company for once."

And so a tentative compliance was reached between us. Though the god revealed his motives for seeking out Mount Kunlan, I knew there had to be more to it. How would he not have heard of such a massacre after all this time had passed? The heavens saw all that happened on earth, so unless he wasn't in communication with the other gods, there was no possibility of him not knowing anything.

I could only swallow my suspicions... and my fears of the worst. The situation was beneficial for me at the moment. Traveling to where the snake spirits made their home was a long distance. With a god at my side, the danger was minimal and I wouldn't have to worry about encountering demon hunters as much on the way. 

We emerged from Mount Kunlan in the midst of snow, and began the trek to the south. Northern Qi was always my home. The cold and barren land was difficult to live in, yet I found it hard to say goodbye.

A vast expanse of forest greeted us in the distance. Snow fell gently from the grey sky as I raised my eyes to watch it glitter under the dying light. I breathed in the cool air, so crisp and dry, as it brushed past my skin and rustled through my hair. The branches of the bare trees swayed back and forth before me with every gust of wind, as light layers of ice began to form on them. I captured the wintry landscape in my memories, and bowed in the direction of my former home. 

"What are you doing?" 

I turned to see the god watching me in confusion, and couldn't help but to curl my lip in contempt.

"Saying goodbye," was my only response.

Would I return to ever see this beauty? I didn't know, but foxes always left the den in their lifetimes. I stood still as a shadow passed over the peak of Mount Kunlan, and made a promise to my clan... and to myself. 

I would return here one day no matter the cost, and I would never allow the name of the fox spirits to die in vain. Revenge may not be possible, but the only thing I could do is try.

That would be my final resolve.