Express before it's late, love before it's gone, feel before it ends, hold before it leaves. Regina a 15 year old high schooler finds it difficult to cope up with her feelings and turns towards the horrific world of drugs.She loses the real her caus...
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She speaks as if she's fine. She trips over her own tongue. The lingering taste of vodka and whisky taint her sinful chapped lips. When she walks she stumbles, she smells like nicotine and she's cold. Ice resides in her veins and heart. The flames of hatred towards herself burn violently and yet all she feels is cold nothingness. Conversations floating around in her head a lot of things she wanted to say but never did. A deep wound that feels as if it will never heal. It started as a pain , a sense of betrayal that hurt so much that she feels hopeless.
Here I go again to my drug dealer. The world has disappointed me drugs will not. I think that I miss him. Yes,I'm talking about my ex boyfriend Aaron. Aaron who broke my heart so hard that I don't even feel it beating anymore. Well basically if I die today would anyone care? No no one. My existence doesn't even matter. This hole in my heart just needs a little something and I don't know what. This walk to the drug store feels more like a walk to home. For nothing really matters. Can't wait to get my next high.
"What you want kiddo? Xanas, molly, heroine, marijuana, codeine or ecstasy?"- dealer
" Just 10 xanas bars, 20 ecstasy pills and 2 grams of heroin." - Regina
"$150"- dealer
"Well.... I only got $120. Would you mind if I give you the rest $30 afterwards?"- Regina
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The dealer looks at my shaking hands as I lit my cigarette.
"Well that ring looks good on your hand. Give it to me when you have $30 you can take it back."- dealer
3 months earlier.( A memory)
Laughing
Aaron kisses my forehead as we lay on each other and roll down the park.
"Aaron stop ( laughing)"- Regina
"I love you Regina with all my belly." - Aaron
"You were supposed to say heart( laughs even more)"- Regina
"But belly is bigger."- Aaron
"I love you my cupcake."- Regina
"Here I have a gift for you."- Aaron
Takes out a very beautiful ring. Give me your hand. I keep my hand gently on his and looks at the bright ring but not more than his eyes. Burn the world down but it still won't shine as bright as his eyes. I noticed the sun only when it hit his face. I noticed the rain only when it wet his lips.
To the world he might be one person but to me he was the world. Whatever he's gone maybe I should get over him. He died in a car accident. All I know about the car accident that he was speeding. Looking at the ring everytime makes me more sad maybe I should just move on. Anyways I'll get it back when I have $30.
"Alright here you go. Take it but keep it safely."- Regina
"Hmm looks expensive."- dealer
"Because it is."- Regina
I speak with the smoke blowing out of my mouth. ... Rose looking at the photos I sent her of Ethan.
"He did this to me. I fell so hard for him. Did he even love me at all? Was everything a lie?" - Rose (sobbing)
Rose breaks down.
Zach breaks down.
Ethan confused and regretting cheating on Rose.
Jack looking through my Instagram profile.
Me snorts a line.
This was a short chapter. Thank you for reading. Can't wait to show the next part.
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