Real Life

⑥What Do I Want?

 
Jungkook jolted at the sound of his alarm. The long and hard journey of becoming an idol was about to start, and he was both anxious and excited.

He quickly got ready, even though he had time, and left his apartment. The walk to the company was long, but he arrived forty minutes earlier, as he had planned to, so he could warm up.

He encountered only a few people on his way to his classroom, but he felt too shy to greet them. Upon entering the classroom, a group of boys who were sitting in the corner turned to look at him.

He bowed, unsure about saying something, and saw them dip their heads as a greeting. He sat away from them and started warming up. As time went by, more and more people came into the classroom and finally Jungkook discerned some familiar faces.

“Hey, Kook!” Jimin grinned.

“Hi, guys.”

“Where were you yesterday? You didn’t answer our calls,” Seokjin said as they joined him.

“I was at home doing... nothing,” he murmured. His eyes flew towards the door as two figures entered. He met Taehyung’s gaze for a mere second and dropped his head again.

Jimin noticed his weird behavior and glanced behind him. “Oh, Taehyung!” He waved at him.

Great, Jungkook thought, a sigh falling from his lips.

Taehyung neared them with Youngjae by his side. “Good morning, guys.”

“Hi. Are you ready for our first day?” Youngjae asked.

“I can’t wait!” Seokjin chirped.

“Me too,” Jimin added.

“Jungkook, you don’t look so excited,” Youngjae said with a chuckle.

Jungkook glanced up at him, but before he could respond, the dance teacher breezed into the room.

“Good morning to everyone. My name is Eunhyuk. We will be spending a lot of time together, so I hope we can have a great year. And I also hope you won’t break down from the pressure. It won’t be easy. Especially for you. You will meet your seniors during the break. You should respect them and get along with them well. Ask them for pointers. They’ll help you.”

Eunhyuk checked the attendance book to see if everyone was there, and soon the first class of the day started.

The teacher was strict with them, harsh even, causing most of them to lose their confidence. And Jungkook was one of them.

“Is that what I showed, Jungkook?” Eunhyuk asked once and twice and thrice.

All Jungkook could utter was, “I’m sorry.”

 
After two hours of scolding and dancing, their first class ended. Jungkook took his backpack and shuffled towards the changing room. His head hung over his droopy shoulders in complete defeat, and unconscious sighs spewed from his mouth. That was awful. Am I really that bad?

He dropped his bag and splashed a handful of water on his face, then stared at his reflection in the mirror. Am I really worth it? His vision blurred with pained tears, and he did his utmost to smother them. He jerked at the sound of the door opening and headed to the bench.