The Stars in His Eyes

Chapter 12

When Mikey came barreling down the stairs and into his brother's room, Pete right on his heels, he entered a moment of pure chaos. Frank was still sitting atop the futon looking slightly disheveled, his eyes fixed on a dark gap between a bookshelf and the wall. Gerard occupied that gap, pressed tight against the wall rocking and wailing unintelligible words at the top of his lungs while he continued to pull at his vibrant hair.

"What the fuck did you do to him?!" Mikey asked, squaring up with Frank.

"I- we were- he kissed me and then he was just-"

"You kissed him, fuck you can't- Gerard don't-"

Before he had time to figure out just what had put his brother into such a panicked state Gerard was scrambling to his feet and bounding up the stairs. Mikey pushed past Pete and raced after him knowing just how unpredictable he was when he was like this.

An eerie quiet settled in the room after the brothers made their exit, Frank was the first to break it.

"What just happened? He was fine and then- did I do something?"

Pete crossed the room, perching himself on the edge of the futon, a thoughtful look in his eyes.

"Frank, I know you're attracted to him, I get it he's hot, but you- Gerard can't give you that kind of relationship."

"Why, what's going on with him?"

"It's not really my place and I don't even know the full story, but he's a sexual assault survivor. It happened a few years back, before I moved here. Look, whatever happened, it fucked him up pretty bad."

"I didn't know-"

"Hey, don't beat yourself up about it, how could you've. I did the same thing when I first met Mikey. I'm a hugger ya know and when I first met Gee I just thought he was shy so I jumped on him and he just lost it. He wouldn't come in the same room as me for a solid six months."

Frank allowed a small smile, but it didn't reach his eyes.

He had known there was something different about the boy with the fiery hair, something that had set those worry lines in his smooth young face, but he never would have expected something like this. A kaleidoscope of emotions began swirling through his being; sorrow, pity, but strongest of all hot, seething hatred for whoever could dare to hurt such a bright and gentle soul as Gerard.

Frank didn't really have time to process any of those feelings before a livid Mikey Way was storming back down the staircase.

"You have to leave, now!"

"Mikey, I literally can't. It's still light out. Look, I'm sorry, I didn't know he was a survivor. Please, if I can just-"

"You told him!?" Mikey exclaimed rounding on Pete.

"Not really, but he has a right to know-"

"He has no fucking right, and neither do you!"

Mikey turned back to Frank, slowly approaching him with a raised accusatory index finger.

"You have no idea what I've been through, what I've had to give up to try to keep him safe. My brother is already a big enough fuck up without throwing an unrequited vampiric romance into the mix so you can-"

"Mikey shut up."

"No Pete, I will not shut up. And, if you're going to take his side you can-"

"Seriously Mikey, shut the fuck up." Pete said, raising a wary hand to point behind the lanky Way brother.

There stood a slightly calmer, more disheveled than usual looking Gerard, his mouth agape at what he had just heard.

All of Mikey's bravado quickly deflated. "Gee, I'm sorry I didn't mean- I thought you were laying down upstairs."

"You- you forgot my medicine. The dreams."

"Shit, I'm sorry Gee."

"Can you ju- just get it?"

Mikey stood there in silence, feeling the lowest he ever had. How could he look his brother in the face and tell him what he had done, that he would have to suffer now because of his own reckless actions.

"There isn't any Gee."

"But, why? It hasn't been that long since it was filled and-"

"Be- because I've been using it."

Tension hung in the air like a sickening fog. How could he, Gerard thought, when he knew how much he depended on the drug when he was in crisis.

"I see."

"Gee, I'll call your doctor and-"

"No! Just get out of my room, all of you!"

A nervous Frank piped up now, "I can't actually leave right this moment, it's still daylight."

"Fine, you get to stay for now."

"Gerard, you shouldn't be alone-"

"Don't worry, your big fuck up of a brother will manage."

"Gee-"

"I said GET OUT!"

With that, both Mikey and Pete made their way, wordlessly, up the stairs. The younger Way brother had never felt quite so low in his life, both due to his actions and the words that had so carelessly spilled from his idiotic mouth. This, he thought, must be what rock bottom felt like.

When they reach the kitchen Mikey finds his voice.

"Pete," he says grabbing his friend's shoulder, "I need help, I don't want to be this person I've become."

"Don't worry man, we'll get through this. Together."