Falter

Chapter 39 - guilty heart

ELIZA

I decided to stay at home for the upcoming days leading to the official meeting we'll have for the promo tour. I haven't checked my phone in days, not interested about what's happening to the world right now. Because if I have my phone right now, I'll call him and I hate myself for that. He could be hanging out with his friends or eating with his family or with Millie. My heart ached on that thought. I wish I could just erase him entirely from my mind, completely forget what we had. It's breaking me apart. And with the promo tour coming up, which I would have to endure being with him, being near him, makes me stressed enough as it is.

I'm still in my pajamas, thankful my period ended yesterday. Now, I should feel relieved but I'm not. I really want to go to Jason's right now but I don't want to get in the way. Especially how that girl looked me up and down. I don't have a better thing to do but lock myself in my bedroom and never go out.

I heard my stomach rumble and I padded to the kitchen so I could grab something to eat. My hair is a mess and I haven't showered. Just as I was about to grab the cereal from the cupboard, I heard a knock.

"Eliza!" I hear Amy's muffled voice from behind the door.

"Coming!"

As I open the door, she's all dressed up with her blonde hair curled, cascading down her front. She's wearing a lavender top and faded jeans.

"Get dressed! We're going out!" she squealed, letting herself in in my apartment. I looked at her like she's crazy. I don't even plan to step outside for the next few days.

"You know I can't..."

"Ugh, c'mon. You'd really prefer being holed up in here than to have fun?" she asked while she clutched her Prada bag.

"Where are we going anyway?" I asked, rubbing my temples. This is making my head hurt, well, this is probably because of the rosé wine.

"Well, this is a children's party, Austin's so excited to go." Austin is Amy's 7-year-old son, who's had difficulty socializing with other kids because of his autism so this is a progress that I really loved to hear.

"Oh wow, he does?"

"Yes! That's why I want to drag you along since he can't stop talking about you since the last time we video called."

I shake my head and laugh. I became friends with Austin with the occasional talks we've had over the phone and I'm looking forward to hanging out with him more often.

"Okay, fine. Wait for me, I'll just shower."

I wore a plain black t-shirt and faded skinny jeans, paired with my black cap and the shoes Hunter gave to me. I wasn't able to leave it since I was wearing it on the flight home. I chose to go with my black boots. Once all set, I came out and Amy was on her phone, tapping away.

"Anyway, where's Austin?"

"We'll pick him up on the way there. He's out at the store with his Dad."

I locked the door and I climbed in her car. I feel bare without even bringing anything. I didn't even leave with my phone. Well, I won't be needing it anyways.

"So, where is this party we're going?"

She didn't answer since she got a call when she was about to tell me. I sat and stared outside, I felt so tired and empty and I don't even know if I can smile in a party full of children. I rested my head and I didn't realize I drifted asleep until Amy was shaking me awake.

"Girl, wake up, we're here."

I wiped my eyes and looked outside. It was an absolute dream party for a girl. Complete with an inflatable castle and trampolines. Children are already playing outside and I never even noticed Austin was with us already until he hugged me when I woke up.