Microcosms of You

All I Wanted

I am a complicated creature.

All I wanted was for people to notice me, or at least my work. I have spent countless hours, doing what I love without getting the recognition I thought I deserved.

All I wanted was to get a simple break from the world, lean back and be at peace. The world is full of distractions, making you worry about infinite things without giving you the absolute answer.

All I wanted was for people to know me. I want to open my thought to the world for them to know what I feel, what I like and what I want to be. I want people to understand me the way I want them to.

All I wanted was to be known throughout the world, be famed for my career. I want to prosper in my work, and I want to inspire others through it.

But I am a complicated creature.

All I wanted was for people to leave me alone, rotting in the dark. I want people to know that I am not the one to share my work to the world. I want people to shut their eyes from my life just because I was afraid that I was making a fool out of myself.

All I wanted was to be able to think endlessly about the things I need to accomplish. I wanted to worry myself with useless facts and how I could distract myself from the fact that I am as useless as a pile of blank pages.

All I wanted was for people to stay strangers to me. I don't want them to think that I am improper or be convinced that I am not worthy of friendship, so I want to keep quiet and never bother anyone.

All I wanted was for fame to reside far from me. I've seen people to indulged themselves in the pool of renown, and I've seen them fall apart and end in pitiful situations.

All I wanted was to shut my thoughts to the world. I wanted to be alone.

But I am a complicated creature.

I want the other one by day and I will be wanting another by night. I get confused which track I need to follow. I get attached to wrong people and harmful friendships. I make mistakes. I forget my values. I am imperfect.

And for that imperfection, all I wanted was one thing: understanding.

Can you give it to me?