The Alchemist and the Lizard

Surprises

Edward waited next to Seth as he unlocked the door to his apartment. A while back he had seen Mustang and Hawkeye (in disguise) following him. They were just around the corner of the hallway.

Seth opened the door and gestured for Edward to go inside. It was completely dark in the room. Seth closed the door behind them and locked it.

"Well, my sweet. You are so...vulnerable."

Edward listened to his footsteps as he walked across the floor and to what he assumed was the kitchen. He couldn't see anything.

"It...intrigues me darling." Seth walked closer to Edward. "Well..." He leaned his face close to his and stroked his hair. "You're so intoxicating." The point of a knife went down Edward's neck and Ed gasped. "How about a kiss?" 

The second those words left Seth's mouth, Edward felt Envy leap of his shoulder and attack his face.

"What the hell-?" Seth stumbled around in the darkness trying to figure out what was going on.

"Well, guess my cover's blown now." Edward said in his normal voice, clapping his hands across the floor to make a spear.

In the light from the transmutation, Edward could see Seth's face twist into horror and shock. He picked up Envy and threw him across the room, and he made a loud thud against the wall.

"You're a-a alchemist! And a b-boy!"

"That's right!" Edward grinned.

"You're tiny! I really believed you!"

Edward growled. "What was that again?"

Seth responded by throwing the knife squarely into Ed's left shoulder. "Aaugh!" Edward fell to the ground. Seth went on top of him, pinning him down, bearing a small pocket knife. 

"Ever had your lips carved out before?" 

Mustang and Hawkeye were pounding on the door trying to get it open. "Fullmetal!" Mustang yelled.

"Ah, so you're the Fullmetal Alchemist." Seth drew a line horizontally on Edward's bottom lip. Blood flowed out, staining his chin. Next he dug the knife deep into his cheek and dragged it downwards. Edward cried out from the pain and tried to clap his hands together but Seth was too strong. Footsteps sounded from across the room and came towards them.

"Hey, I'm the only one who's allowed to hurt the pipsqueak." Edward heard Envy say in his normal human voice. It was him, but he sounded really weak and sort of far away.

"Envy!" Edward said in surprise.

Envy's bloodied face leaned over them menacingly. "Hurt the pipsqueak again, and I will kill you myself."