It was the early days of the yelitude month, December. Celebration was in the air, the smell of dough and pastries filled every corner of Abuja. From down town Kubwa to the buzzing streets of Wuse 2 you could smell the turkeys roast in nearby ovens. Every platform on social media was burning up with hot pictures and new clothes. The "Ajebutter" kids were all about travel plans "chop life gang", the party poppers popularly known as "if I perish I perish", and those with no plans than staying indoors because their bank account "tilazzdent". The name coined for the month for those who could afford the billings was "detty December".
One sunny afternoon, Funsho, a social media celeb who had no life outside of social media, logged onto his twitter account as usual. Surfing the twitter app is more like an addiction for him. While engaging a couple of tweets on his timeline, a picture was retweeted to his timeline that left his eyes nictitating multiple times. He zoomed in on the picture and there she was, Omotola, a girl who's beauty could make the sun look dim and put the moon to shame on its brightest days. Her beauty so captivating, he couldn't help but drool. She had the right curves in all the right places so he couldn't contain his emotions, he wanted more, a touch, to suckle on those luscious lips, he wanted it all.
Within the twinkle of an eye he found himself hitting the follow button and just as fast he was on he the follow button and just as fast he was on her TL asking for a follow back. Few minutes later, notification of Omotola following back popped up, he was overwhelmed with so much joy it was ask if he recieved a credit alert. As a sharp guy he slid into her DM like a car with bad breaks. He followed the textbook approach and said:
" To every general rule, there is an exception. I don't do this (slide into dm immediately after follow) but your beauty caught me off guard. I hope to get a response" Funsho wrote.
"Good morning. Thanks for that" Tola replied with the heart emoji.
The butterflies in Funsho's tummy from feeding his eye on Tola's beauty made him forget the courtesy of saying "Good morning" before his first message
"Good morning, forgive my manners" He said
"Its nice reading your message this morning, how was your night?" She replied thankfully
Tola's response fueled Funsho's confidence more. He felt like he hit the right spot.
"Oh! Glad I made your morning. My night was good" He replied joyfully
Funsho kept Tola engaged in the dm for a while, getting to know her better.
"So where are you now?" Tola asked
"I'm in Abuja currently but anything can move me anytime" Funsho replied
"Hustle?" Tola further asked
"I work here and my family is here. By family I mean parents and siblings. I'm not married and I'm single" Funsho stated clearly
"Lol, you dont really need to say that. It's good to be married" Tola replied sarcastically
"Lol I know being married is good but I needed to point it out to you." Funsho continued with his indirect shots
"You're in a relationship I guess" Funsho hopefully asked
"No, not yet" Raising Funsho's hope, Tola answered
Funsho was happy with the response and the picture he had in his head fantasizing about finding his future wife.
The chat continued and Funsho could no longer hold the excitement within him. He asked if Tola was based in Abuja as well.
"Where are you based?" He asked
"I'm based in Nasarawa " She replied
"Oh, wow! You're within the range of my location. Which part of Nasarawa?" With excitement, he asked
"Maraba" she replied
"Wow, I stay around Asokoro, you're really close to where I stay" he replied
"Before it skips my mind, I'm AS" Funsho threw his first shot
"Lol, telling me your genotype already, wow. I'm AA then" She gracefully took the shot.
"Dont mind me, you can never tell where this journey might take us." The sniper in him continue taking the shot on target.
Funsho requested for her phone number and called her immediately. They would speak for hours unending, rapidly , days turned into weeks and their love began to burn like a flame. It was as if they were a match made in heaven. He had finally found the one that would make him settle down.
He called her friends one evening into a private restaurant to discuss on the best way "to pop the big question", ideas were flowing in but one came closest to what he had in mind for the woman of his dreams. He was going to wait until her brithday which was just few days away, he would have the words "will you marry me" on a cake which would be covered and unveiled just before they sing the birthday song. He would have a ring put in it so when she cuts the cake, the ring case would fall out with the very first piece of cake he got to work and started making plans, he warned her friends not to ruin his surprise because some of them couldn't keep their mouths shut even if their lives depended on it. The day was finally here, all was set and the atmosphere was so jolly. He hit his glass cup as he's about to make a toast, the room went quiet and all eyes were fixed on him.
"Omotola mi, my sweet cherry pie " he stopped for a second to wipe a tear from his right eye. then continued
"Today we are all gathered here to share this day with you, your special day , I hope it is everything you wish for and even more." He said romantically
"Where is the birthday cake?" he yelled out to the waiters of the 5 star restaurant he had taken her, her family and friends too.
They put off the lights and the unveiling of the cake began, everybody started singing the birthday song
and as soon as she blew out the candles and the lights came back on, she couldn't believe her eyes.
At this point Funsho was already on one knee, she started to cry, tears of joy. Who would have thought that a short social media love would lead to this? F
unsho started his rehearsed speech
"Honey, since the very first time I saw your picture on my Twitter, I knew you were the girl I had been waiting for all my life.
I have spent my days searching for something that was never missing to begin with, you are my joy, and i would like for you to be part of my life. Will you marry me? " He popped the question finally
Tola chuckled a bit
"if someone had told me that I would be getting married to someone I just met months ago, I would have said was is a lie. But you complete me, Adeori mi, you know how to calm me down when I'm angry, I love you, yes I will marry you" She responded with so much joy in her heart.
The whole room was filled with applause and Awe. Funsho leaned in for a kiss and just as his lips met Tola's lips, she received a resounding slap from her mother who exclaimed
"My friend wake up, what kind of sleep is that, that you are kissing the dog" Tola snapped out of her slumber and reality hit her,
It was only a dream, there was no Funsho, no cake and no fancy restaurant she had to go back to her life of being alone
***********************
Co-writer: Rahaman Aiman
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See Through Me: A collections of contemporary poetry and short stories
Poesía"See Through Me" is a captivating book filled with contemporary poetry and short stories that delve deep into the human experience. It takes you on a journey through raw emotions, vulnerability, and self-discovery. Each page invites you to see throu...
