Shade

Chapter 9 - Ghosted

I decided to call Angie. She was a friend I lived with for a time. We shared an apartment just outside of San Francisco. She was the closest thing I had ever had to a best friend, until I took off one day on the back of Gabe #2's motorcycle. I didn't say goodbye. I don't think she ever forgave me. But Dear Daniel's words had done nothing to calm my nerves. And I needed help I knew Angie could provide.

"Kit!" she answered with more enthusiasm than I deserved.

"Hi Angie."

"What's going on? Where in the world is Kit Marra?"

"An artist commune," I said. "I just left Burning Man and I found this great place to stay. It's an old farm in NorCal. It's actually really cool."

"Are you with Gabe?"

"No." I tried not to sound too embarrassed. "That ended. I sort of met this other guy, Trevor and-"

"Are you with Trevor?"

"...No. We broke up at Burning Man and now I'm with Jonas."

There was silence on the other end of the line. And judgement. Judgy silence.

Jonas entered the room and began to change out of his painting clothes. He smiled at me sweetly.

"So, how's that going?" Angie finally asked.

"Jonas is thoughtful and smart and kind," I said pointedly. "And he's a very talented painter."

"Oh brother, he's in the room isn't he?" Angie groaned. "Is he cute?"

"No he's hideous," I joked. "Disfigured even."

"With a huge penis," Jonas added.

"A huge disfigured penis."

Angie laughed in spite of herself. "Well, I'm glad you're alive."

"Thank you. I was calling to ask you about something a bit peculiar."

"I would expect nothing less from you," replied Angie. There was judgement in her tone again. I chose to ignore it.

"You have that friend Laura who dated that guy who did paranormal investigations. Does he still do that?"

Jonas shot me a perplexed look.

"Well, they broke up," said Angie. "But I'm pretty sure he still does that. I don't think he makes a living wage, though."

"That's not surprising," I said. "Do you still have his number?"

Jonas walked towards me. I waved him away.

"Yeah, one sec. I'll text it to you."

"Thanks. What was his name again?"

"Hector."

"Oh yeah," I said with a chuckle. "Hector the inspector, I should have fucking remembered that."

Angie didn't laugh. I heard her sigh as if she suddenly remembered she was mad at me again. I imagined her standing in the middle of the living room, her teal fuzzy socks sticking to the weave of her colorful Mexican rug. Her scrunchie had migrated from her hair to her wrist.

"That's why you called?"

"Yeah, I might actually take advantage of his expertise."

"Okay," she said sadly. "Can you just do me a favor and let me know you're alive sometimes? You don't have to let your guilt about being a shitty communicator prevent you from actually communicating with people. You don't have to disappear."

That's how close we once were. She knew the patterns of my behaviors and how my brain rationalized my choices. I missed her.

"Thanks Angie. I'll try."

We disconnected. Jonas had his hands on his hips. His head was cocked to one side.

"What was that about?"

"That was my old roommate, Angie," I explained. I plugged my phone back in to charge. "We didn't part on the best terms."

"I mean the part about the paranormal investigator."

Right. What would I say? How much would I tell him? How much would he believe? I decided to keep it vague.

"I saw something today in the orchard, something I can't explain. Then Daniel told me he's seen similar things around here. I thought it might be interesting to have it checked out."

He scratched his head.

"Fair enough, but you can't just invite an investigator onto the commune. You got to run it by Walter and Evie."

"I wasn't going to not ask them," I protested. "You think they're gonna say no?"

"I mean, Evie doesn't really like having that sort of person here, you know an outsider, probing around, judging our way of life. It's negative energy."

I couldn't hide the annoyance on my face.

"There's already negative energy here!" I said. "Bonnie should agree with me. She said there was a different feeling in the air just the other morning."

Jonas cocked his head again. "Bonnie?"

I heard it too in my memory. My heart skipped a beat. "Evelyn. I meant to say Evelyn."

My head began to feel like it was underwater. I reached for the black journal off of Jonas's desk and sat on his bed. "Bonnie Dunham," I said to myself as I flipped through the pages.

"What are you doing?" Jonas asked me. "You're not the kind of girl who likes to mess with people for the hell of it? You know, start a lot of drama?"

I looked up at him with shock. I couldn't believe he would ask me that. But they weren't his words or thoughts, I knew. This was a seed Evelyn had planted.

"No," I said, trying to remain calm. "Drama finds me sometimes, but I don't revel in it. I don't go looking for it."

He turned away from me. A chill came through the air. Frost gathered on the window. Shadows moved in the hall.

"I don't know, Molly," He said. "Everybody talks. Everybody says we're not supposed to mix."

His voice was darker, echoing, and distant.

"Everybody or Miss Dunham?" I responded. Or did I? My mouth moved, but the words weren't my own.

"She's just looking out for me."

"No she's not!" I shouted. I stood and grabbed his shoulders. "She wants us apart, Arthur! Father Wilkes tells me the same thing. I am Nisenan, I should be with my own people- But he doesn't feel what's in my heart. He can't know! Stay with me Arthur!"

For a moment, Jonas's face was pale and freckled, his hair was light and wavy. Then the frost cracked the window and heat returned to the room. I was Kit and he was Jonas and we were holding each other in his bedroom.

"Kit-"

"Woah, that was really weird."

He shuddered and rubbed his shoulders. He looked disturbed. I felt oddly energized, validated by the shared experience.

"Oh, I have goosebumps! That was really weird!"

Jonas ran his hands through his dark hair and sat, taking deep breaths.

"Yeah, I guess we need to talk to Evie about this."