My journal

December 5 2014

im really happy and depressed at the same time. im listening to a sad but heartwarming song that i love, im also happy because edward made me tea. ^^ it seems like such a unimportant thing that i shouldnt get excited over..but im so happy he took the time to make tea for me. i cant stop smiling >w<  today has been a strange day. its a half day, i cant wait to get home tho, i dont really have anyone to go see, so i guess i can relax at home and watch anime. after i finish  'say i love you' im going to watch deadman wonderlan, then psycho pass. if i finish those im gonna watch something else i guess. idk..i kinnda wanted to go to edwards place to watch wolf children, but i could never get the courage to ask. plus he is prob. busy, i dont wanna bother him. >.<  my dad ended up coming back last night though. he said he got a new job, thats why he was gone for about two days. i guess its fine but im going to remeber this and use it to my advantage when he complains that i never tell him anything anymore. He thinks that im being all hush hush about my social life when really i want to tell him, its just he's never home. to be honest, i miss having him around. Not the drunk part, but before my moms seizures started to ge tworse, she used to work and my dad stayed home. he cooked and cleaned and it was really fun because he was always smiling and getting excited about the latest marvel or DC movie that he wanted to watch with us. all of us would play dead or alive and my dad wold jump in too...back when i was a child, things were so simple. we moved alot but i thought that was normal. whenever i asked why, my mom wouldnt say anything. so i stopped asking. i wish i was five again. so i could change alot of things.  im gonna go draw, 

see ya