Bizarre Love Triangle (lgbtq+)

2 FALLING

I opened the door as quietly as possible in case Noel was already sleeping.

"Hi", I said when I saw him sitting on the balcony.

"Hey", he said.

"May I?" I sat next to him on the swing seat. We All Fall in Love Sometimes by Elton John played from a little speaker next to him.

"What you're doing out here?"

He smiled and reached for my hand. "Just thinking." I put my head on his shoulder.

"I love this song."

"Me too."

And we just stayed there, listening to Elton John and holding each other's hand.

When the song was over, I turned to him. "Why weren't you at David's earlier?"

"I didn't check my phone until like an hour ago and then it was too late. Did you have a good night?"

"Yeah, it was nice. Oh, guess which book Elia wants me to read!"

"Eh ... Harry Potter?"

"I wish."

"Angels and Demons?"

I shook my head.

"Famous or not-so-famous?"

"Very famous."

"Lord of the Rings."

"No."

"Oh, oh I know it!" He grinned at me and said teasingly: "Fifty Shades of Grey."

"Nearly as bad." I took the book from my backpack and showed him the cover: "It's Twilight!"

"Twilight? You give her the best book ever written and she gives you Twilight? Come on, Hun, you're better than that."

I took a deep breath. "It seems like she didn't take this seriously at all. And then", I buried my face in my hands, "thenshealmostkissedme," I mumbled under my breath.

"What was that? She kissed you?"

"No, she didn't. But I think she was about to?"

"And did you want her to?"

"Yes. No. I don't know!"

"I never asked you but you're a lesbian, right?"

"I am not a lesbian. I'm pan."

He looked at me curiously.

" – I'm pansexual, which means I am attracted to people regardless of their gender. But the last time I was with a girl everything went shit and that scares me!"

"The ex-girlfriend you told us about?"

I nodded.

"But you like her? Elia, I mean."

"I think? I like being with her. And when our legs touch or our hands my heart flutter and everything feels exciting and ... you know how it is, right?" Even talking about her made my heart skip a beat.

He took a second to answer, but then he nodded.

"But then it seems like she doesn't care at all – like this Twilight-thing? I am really angry about that! She doesn't take anything seriously! She failed like – what? Two of her midterms? And all the plants in her room are dead. If she can't keep them alive how is she gonna take care of a relationship?"

Suddenly, Noel laughed. "Did you just compare houseplants to a relationship?"

"You think my fears are irrational?"

"No, but I like the way your mind works."

"Well, thank you."

We kept quiet for some minutes. Only the swing seat squeaked from time to time.

"What's that song?", I asked.

"Screams and Dream by Faye."

"By whom?"

"Faye. Wait, I'm gonna send you the link."

"Noel?"

"Yes?"

"Are you okay? You seem sad."

"Oh no, everything's fine!"

"Okay."

I went to bed some minutes later while Noel stayed on the balcony. I couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. Though he never was really talkative, he was quieter than usual.