can i go back - markhyuck

what is this ?

[p.s - every part under the letter content (aka the italic one) is a flashback. thanks.]

mark was cleaning up his room. yeah, the room has been a mess, as if there was a monster in his room. he pick up his jackets and he saw the book ..
mark sighed. he pick up the book and found out that it is not his. he widened his eyes and opened the book and a few paper fell down and an envelope.

for mark.

mark was confused and picked up the letter. he still haven't figure out whose book is that since its not his. the letter has no sender but it was for him. he sits on his bed, open the envelope and start reading it.

hi, mark
the thing about you reading this is that
i might not be here anymore
so .. i want to tell you something
firstly, thank you so much
for being a friend during my hardest time
not judging me
and treat me well
i really admire your kindness
you are the light for me.

without reasons, donghyuck always being left out by his classmates until this new student, mark that well .. his classmate said 'unfortunately sitting with donghyuck' but it turns out that they become quite a bestfriend. it was elementary school and they were friends until they were senior high school. oh how much they know about each other, they even seen each other naked which is one of the thing they regret seeing.

despite all the knowings, donghyuck still have one big secret that he never told anyone except himself, well he's scared that's why he kept it to himself. that he actually liked mark. not that he's gay, well he started as a straight and have a few crush on some girls but well at the end he found out that he just liked mark. or maybe that's gay ? okay whatever.

mark always liked skinship as long as donghyuck knows him. not kissing though, just hugging and not only donghyuck but also to everyone but it gets quite 'too much' when he do it with donghyuck. sleeping on donghyuck's lap, making donghyuck sit on his lap, reading comic while donghyuck hugs him, or just hugging for a long time. that's mark. he's also a really kind person and is a real honest person especially towards donghyuck.

all of the sudden donghyuck became quite confident and wanted to confess his feeling for mark. but it takes time for donghyuck to actually confess it, yeah a month of hesitating and the day came.

"i-i want to say something," said donghyuck.
"why do you ask ? just say it," a smile planted on mark's face.

"i like you."

the smile is no longer there. he looked speechless.

"d-don't talk to me anymore." and he left.

donghyuck was standing there alone. a lot of thoughts came in mind.

did i make a mistake ?
he'll hate me
i won't have anyone
i will be alone
once again
or is he playing games with me
its okay hyuck
he's only joking
NO
he will hate you
he won't be with you
he'll leave you
just like anyone did
he is not different
he's just like the others
you will be left alone again
no one loves you.
no one will
you are a disgrace to this world
you don't deserve a happiness
you worth nothing
we all hate you

and his alter ego take up his mind. he fall unconsciously to the cold hard floor as tears flows down his cheek.